Anything Else But The Truth
by Trixy2
Summary: It's hard to hide pain, when everyone can see it. Danny hasn't quite been his self, and the team has begun to notice. After being forced to go to the hospital he receives the bad news. Lots of Sick!Danny... Reviews are always appreciated!
1. Chapter 1

The body of thirteen year old Alison Whitman was stiff and cold as the icy water brushed against her feet. She had been dead less then a day and already forgotten; her skin was white and stiff as her glossy eyes stared up to the sky, light was gone from her. She was gone, and the gaping wounds on stab marks on her stomach told a story that had an end, but now it needed a beginning.

Danny Messer and Mac Taylor stood over Alison's body with a mournful look in their eyes. They had seen bodies before, more then they could count, but this time it struck a match that neither had expected. Mac was the first to move from their stiffened position as he crouched down beside her cold body, and began taking photos of her.

"Wonder if her parents even know she's missin'." Danny said softly, praying he was wrong.

"I'm sure they do. Why don't you start with trace?" Mac asked in a way Danny knew he didn't have a choice.

"Yeah." Danny answered still staring at the young girl's lifeless eyes.

"Danny?" Mac said hoping to knock him back into reality. "You alright?"

"What? Yeah, no I'm fine." He denied walking away. Truth was he wasn't fine, working homicide cases was getting harder over the last couple of weeks. There was a drowning feeling in the back of his throat he couldn't quite understand, as if his own death was chasing after him. Lost in his thoughts, he hadn't noticed his coworker walk up behind him.

"Hey Dan." Sheldon said, seeing that he startled Danny, he placed a hand on his shoulder. "Whoa, sorry bud. You alright?" He asked, looking concerned.

"Why does everyone keep asking me that?" He said moving back to work.

"Alright, alright, my bad." Sheldon smiled uncomfortably, joining Mac with the body he quietly leaned closer to his boss. "Hey Mac, you notice anything off about him?" Nodding towards Danny.

"Lindsay's pregnant, it's difficult working a case with a dead kid, makes it harder knowing you have one on the way." Mac explained watching as Danny slowly worked.

"I'm not just talking about today, the last couple of weeks he's been in his own world. More tired then normal, and he's getting noticeably paler." Sheldon explained, pretending to be working as to not alarm Danny they were talking about him.

"You're right. It's probably just stress, Lindsay is due soon. I'll talk to him." Mac explained, putting his camera aside and working the body. "Come on, we have work to do." Getting to the task at hand.

* * *

By the time Danny had made it back to the lab he was beyond tired, the circles under his eyes were darker then normal and his feet were dragging, in fact they were tingling in his exhaustion. Opening his locker, he rested his forehead against the door and took in the cool temperature of the metal. Closing his eyes he pulled in a long breath, feeling his lungs retract, he opened his eyes to find he was no longer alone.

"Hey babe." Lindsay said rubbing his back with her small hand. "Tough case?"

"What are you doing here?" Danny asked turning to face her.

"I had some stuff from my locker I needed." She explained as Danny pulled her in and gave her a warm hug, Lindsay moved to pull away but Danny held on. "What's going on, Dan?" She asked, holding him back.

"Tough case, thirteen year old kid, she lived on the street." He explained, closing his eyes and resting his cheek on her head.

"I'm sorry."

"Me too." He said releasing her from his grasp. "I really needed that."

"It's what I'm for." She said with a smile.

"I have to get to the trace lab, meet me for lunch?" He asked, leaning forwards and giving her a soft kiss.

"Definitely, I feel like a burger, and ice cream... and pizza!" She said as Danny laughed.

"Alright, maybe I'll find you a buffet." He said kissing her forehead. "See you in a bit." He said closing his locker and leaving the room.

The hallway seemed longer as Danny slowly walked the short distance to the trace lab, finding Adam had already started, he found his place opposite the table of him.

"Adam, what have you got?" He asked,noticing how weak he sounded.

"I've started on substance Mac found under our vic's nose, I'm running it through GCMS." He explained, not looking up from his paper work.

"Right on, I'll grab the gum and see what I can do." Danny turned suddenly to retrieve the gum when a sudden wave of dizziness took him. "Whoa." He said, grabbing the table for support as his vision blurred.

"You OK, buddy?" Adam asked, putting his work down and immediately found himself at Danny's side.

"Just dizzy." Danny said, trying to shake the feeling.

"Here sit down." He said, leading him to a chair not far from them. "You need something?" He asked, Danny looked up at him and saw the concern on his face.

"Adam, I just got a little dizzy, I'm good." He lied, as a sudden pain hit him from behind his eyes.

"Yeah..." He said, leaving Danny side and returning to his side of the table with a worried look on his face.

Danny took a second before he attempted to explain, closing his eyes he tried to push the pain out of his head, but it didn't seem to be working. Adam stared at him, fear of him collapsing in front of him, and not knowing what to do.

"I... I haven't slept yet, alright? I'm just a little over worked. I'm fine." He lied. "Just, don't say anything. Please?" He didn't need Lindsay stressing over him when she was seven months pregnant.

"I won't. If you need anything let me know, OK?"

Danny opened his eyes and looked up at Adam, giving him a nod he steadied himself as he continued to work on the gum.

"So..." Adam said, feeling awkward. "This girl was only thirteen?" He asked.

"Yeah." Danny said sadly.

"I don't even know what I'd do if that were my kid." He pondered out loud. Forgetting about Lindsay momentarily, Adam looked up at Danny regretfully. "Sorry, Danny."

"No, it's alright, I'm with you, I'd find the son-of-a-bitch and no one would find his body." Danny said as goose bumps ran up his arms.

"That's for damn sure." Adam laughed looking down at his work. Danny chuckled at Adam, looking down a drop of blood landed on the back of his gloved hand. Putting down the evidence, he wiped his nose to find more blood on his glove.

"Oh shit." Danny said, causing Adam to look up.

"Danny?" He asked, noticing the blood. "What the hell is going on?" He said removing his gloves and finding him some tissues to soak up the blood.

"I... I don't know." He was being honest, he really didn't know what was going on. With the constant exhaustion, head aches and dizziness, the bloody nose seemed to be the most interesting advancement in the last couple days.

"Maybe you should talk to Sheldon?" He said, as Sheldon happened to walk into the lab.

"Talk to Sheldon about what?" He stood in the doorway with his hand in his pockets.

"Nothing man, never mind." Danny said slowly standing up, needing his hands to steady himself but was too slow as Sheldon stood in front of him stopping him.

"Nosebleed? What's going on with you, man?" He said putting a hand on his shoulder, pushing him back into his chair.

"What?" Danny said, his voice muffled by the tissue holding to his nose.

"I've noticed you've been off, you should get checked out." Sheldon said, looking at Danny's eyes which were clearly tired.

"I'm good, it's just allergies."

"Allergies to what? It's December?" Sheldon was getting angry, Danny could see it.

"Mind your business." Danny said standing up and walking past him.

"You are my business Danny, whatever is going on with you, you need to deal with it." He said as Danny left the room, leaving Sheldon and Adam worrying.

* * *

Danny entered the bathroom, turning on the water he ran his hands under the cool water ridding his skin of the blood from his nose. Scooping the water in his palms he washed his face in the cool water, instantly relaxing. Looking up into the mirror his reflection sensed his lies, he didn't look relaxed and he didn't look fine. It was no wonder Sheldon wouldn't leave him alone. The circles under his eyes were darker then normal, and his cheeks were pale, and truth be told, he felt like shit.

Pulling some paper towels off the roll to dry his face a sharp pain stabbed his skull. Moaning in pain, he bent forward and holding his head with both hands. His vision blurred, as the pain worsened, as he fell to his knees, grabbing the sink, the water was still running, the soft sound of water falling beat into his skull as his nose began to bleed once again.

After what felt like forever, the pain subsided, leaving Danny a bloody mess. Resting his head against the sink, his body shook. Slowly, he regained his composure as he pulled himself into a standing position resting his hands again. Looking at himself in the mirror, he saw blood dripping off of his chin.

"What the..." He said, running water over himself once again. Pulling more paper towels off the roll he dried his face as the door opened behind him.

"You alright?" Sheldon said, standing by the door watching Danny. Doing his best to not shake, he replied.

"I'm good." He said, pressing the towel over his face.

"You're lying." Sheldon said crossing his arms and leaning against the wall.

"Please don't press this." Danny begged, turning to face his friend.

"Press what?" Hoping he'd fess up.

"I'm fine, I'm just over tired. I don't need Lindsay stressed over me." He said, looking at his feet.

"If something is going on with you, you owe it to her to tell her."

"Nothing is go-" He stopped and pressed a hand to his temple.

"Yeah, I can see that." He said moving closer, Danny squeezed his eyes shut.

"Ok it's not nothing." He said taking a breath and finally looking his friend in the eye. "The last couple of weeks I haven't been doing so well." He admitted.

"What do you mean?" He asked, his tone wore a formal doctors tone.

"Headaches, dizziness... I've been so tired I can barely function. I thought I was just stressed, then this happened. I didn't want to say anything, because of Lindsay. She has enough to worry about." He said, motioning to his nosebleed.

"You need help, Dan." Danny looked at his feet once again. "Go home, I'll tell Mac you came down with something. I'm going to call a friend of mine at the hospital and see if he can book you in for an MRI." He put a supportive hand on his shoulder. Danny realized he could no longer hide from this, looking up at his friend he gave him a nod of agreement. "You're going to be fine, it's probably nothing, but just in case its something, we need to know."

"We?" Danny said with a smile.

"Yeah, 'we'." Sheldon smiled, patting him on the back.

"Thanks, Shel." He said defeated.

"Go home, I'll call you in a bit." Sheldon said as he turned and left the bathroom, leaving Danny alone with his thoughts. He hated hospitals, he hated being weak and most of all, he hated when people worried about him. With a dull ache in his head, he realized he wouldn't be getting any work done today anyways.

* * *

Walking through his apartment door he noticed a change, the smells were different, the light was different, he wondered if he was even at the right place.

"Linds?" He called.

"Danny? What are you doing home? I was going to come meet you." She said coming out of the kitchen.

"Oh, right." He said as she got closer.

"What are you doing here?" She was confused.

"I um, I thought I'd pick you up, I was heading this way anyways." He lied.

"Right." She wasn't buying what he was selling. "What's wrong? You haven't been yourself lately?" She led him towards the couch and sat him down.

"I'm just tired." He said, resting his head against the back of the couch. "Mac sent me home early." He continued.

"That's rare... what's really going on?" Lindsay layed down resting her head on his shoulder.

"Nothing." He said finishing with a yawn as his eyes closed. Lindsay stared at his face, noticing for the first time how exhausted he truly was. Slowly and carefully she pulled herself off of the couch, and pulled a blanket over an already sleeping Danny.

Once she was in the kitchen, she found her cell phone and went into the bedroom and closed the door behind her. Dialling Mac's number, she opened the door to make sure Danny was still asleep on the couch.

"Taylor." He answered in a non-chalant manor.

"Mac, Hey it's Lindsay." She sat down on the bed, to releave her feet.

"Is something wrong?"

"No, no, I'm fine. Actually, I'm a little worried about Danny. Why'd you send him home?" She asked causiously.

"I didn't, Sheldon did." Mac said in a cool tone, almost too cool.

"What do you mean?"

"He said he was sick and seeing as how he hasn't been himself lately, I wasn't in disagreence. Is he there now?" He asked.

"Yeah, he came home and practically passed out on the couch." She was worried, something was wrong and no one was telling her what.

"Take care of him, Linds." Mac said, in a tone that told her he had to go.

"I will. Thanks, Mac." Her voice was low.

"Any time." He said as Lindsay ended her call. Sitting on the bed she felt a pit in her stomach, something she didn't like. Slowly moving across the room she opened the door to find Danny asleep on the couch, he looked peaceful. Watching him she felt their baby move inside of her belly, resting a hand on the bump she whispered to herself, 'It's going to be fine, everything is going to be fine.' Hoping she was right.


	2. Chapter 2

Danny slept soundly throughout most of the afternoon until the sun began to set, waking up he found another dull pain in the top of his skull. Opening his eyes, he noticed how quiet it was throughout his apartment, rubbing his temples he sat forwards wincing in pain as he did.

"Sleep OK?" Lindsay said from her chair not too far away.

"How long was I out?" He asked, noticing that she had covered him with a blanket.

"Six hours. Feeling any better?" She asked, closing her book and putting it down beside her.

"Have you been sitting there the whole time?" Danny asked, noticing how comfortable she looked with a blanket wrapped around her and her feet on a cushion in front of her.

"I didn't know if you should be alone or not. You didn't look good when you came home." She was nervous for reasons Danny couldn't understand.

"I'm fine, just over worked. I told you I'm not going anywhere." He smiled.

"I know." Lindsay smiled back as Danny pulled the blanket off of his lap and stiffly stood from the couch.

"Whoa." He said as he lost his balance and grabbed the side of the couch so he wouldn't fall. Lindsay stood up as fast as she could, being pregnant made it hard, putting a hand on Danny's shoulder, he helped him stand straight.

"Danny, what is going on? What's wrong?" She begged, hoping he'd answer her honestly. "Stop being so stubborn and talk to me!" Danny looked at her and saw she had tears in her eyes.

"I don't know." Realizing he has said it out loud he sat back down on the couch, Lindsay sitting with him.

"What do you mean you don't know?"

"I don't want you to be stressed, I think I'm just coming down with something. So maybe you should stay away, I don't want you getting sick." Looking into his eyes, Lindsay sat silent.

"Coming down with what exactly?" She said with hesitant eyes. As Danny explained his symptoms. Lindsay became increasingly scared. "We'll go to the doctor tomorrow and get some tests done." She picked up Danny's hand holding it tight.

"No need, I'm good."

"There is no arguing, we're going. I'll see if I can get an appointment and if we can't we'll just go to the hospital." She stood up and walked towards the phone.

"Linds-" He looked away, in protest.

"Shut up, Danny." She said dialling the phone. "Hi, this is Lindsay Monroe... yes, I'm fine thanks, how are you?... good, good. Do you have an opening tomorrow with Dr. Taylor?" There was a gap of silence as Lindsay nodded to whomever she was speaking with. "Not until Friday?" She said out loud looking at Danny, who sat on the couch shaking his head. He truly hated doctors. "No, Friday is fine. Thank you... you too..." She said ending the call.

"Well, one thing is for sure." Danny said looking at Lindsay.

"What's that?"

"You're going to be a good mother." He smiled as Lindsay stood behind the couch rubbing his shoulders.

"Damn right." Kissing the top of his head. "You hungry?"

"No, I'm going to take a shower." He said getting up slowly from the couch.

"Come 'ere" Lindsay said pulling his body into hers. Wrapping her arms around his neck she looked him in the eyes. "I know you are trying to keep me from stressing, but what if I told you, I like worrying about you?" She smiled as Danny intertwined his fingers at the base of her back.

"Oh yeah?" He said kissing her forehead.

"Yeah." She said before kissing him softly.

"I'll be fine, I promise."

"Good. Now do shower and I'll make some food." She said spatting his ass as he walked away.

Closing the door to the bathroom, Danny's hands shook. Moving towards the shower, he turned the water on letting the hot water steam through the room. Looking at himself in the mirror he saw that most of his colour had come back to his face and the circles under his eyes were not as dark as before.

"Nothing some sleep can't fix." He said reassuring himself. He spoke to soon as pain throbbed behind his eyes, grabbing his head with both hands he leaned forward willing the pain away. He could feel his stomach lurched, his insides twisted as he fell in front of the toilet. His chest hurt as he emptied his stomach into the bowl, feeling as if he was finished, he fell back against the wall bringing his knees to his chest. Resting his throbbing head against his knees he listened as the sound of the water beat down against the tub, filling the room with steam. Breathing didn't seem to stop the pain, but it relaxed his body from the vicious attack. Feeling tears fall from his eyes, he realized how afraid he truly was.

Hearing a knock at the door he heard Lindsay standing beyond. "Dan? You alright?"

"Yeah... I'll be out in a minute." He said, hearing his voice he knew she didn't believe it.

"Alright... take your time." She said standing outside the door a minute longer, listening, making sure he really was fine.

Slowly moving off of the floor he stepped into the hot water, letting it beed down his skin as his hands shook. Secretly praying that nothing would come about this and that there was nothing wrong with him, Friday could wait as long as he could hold off, he didn't want to know what was wrong with him. He just wanted it to go away.

* * *

The rest of the night was uneventful, believing the shower must have has some type of healing powers Danny slept throughout the night and got up and went to work the next day without any pain. Walking off the elevator he was stopped by his boss staring at him as if he was about to explode.

"Morning Mac." Danny said walking towards the locker room.

"How are you feeling?" Mac asked, walking with him.

"I'm good, must have been something I ate. What's happening with the case?" He changed the subject.

"Ah, girl was homeless. Not a lot of leads yet, Flack and Hawkes are looking for her parents."

"Good, what do you want me working on?"

"Help Adam process the clothing. He was a little short handed yesterday." Mac said raising an eyebrow.

"Sorry, boss." Danny apologized as he got to the locker room door.

"Don't worry about it, just take care of yourself. You sure you're alright?" He said backing away, heading towards his office.

"I am, don't worry about me." He faked a confident smile as he entered the locker room to discard his things and find his lab coat.

* * *

The day went by without incident as Danny powered through his work. His office was silent as he milled through work, with Lindsay on maternity leave he found the office almost too quiet for working.

"Messer, tell me you have something!" Don said entering his office and sitting down at Lindsay's empty desk.

"Oh I have something." He said sarcastically sitting back in his desk chair. "I have a pile of trace that means nothing, I have DNA with no connection to our vic and no hits in CODIS, I have a whole lot of useless nothing. I take it things are going well on your end?"

"Nah, no missing persons reports, not a single connection to this kid." He said folding his hands over his stomach as he put his feet on the desk.

"She's thirteen, you'd think her parents would be on every news channel from here to Canada looking for her." He sighed and looked back at his paperwork.

"Unless their guilty." Danny looked up disapproving. "You really think they have no fault here? They aren't even looking for her!"

"I don't think the parents are involved."

"Why?" Taking his feet off the desk he leaned forward, looking at Danny for an explanation.

"Most parents involved in the death of their children, don't throw away with their child. She was dumped in the river, in most cases, parents show some kind of remorse. Leave them somewhere that they will be found. This was a body dump." He said rubbing his temples.

"Makes sense, doesn't make me hate them any less." He took a short breath before he looked up at Danny. "You alright, man?" Don asked, noticing his change in comfort.

"Just a headache." He blinked.

"Shel told me you were having some trouble yesterday." Concern in his voice wasn't hard for Don to hide, being an older brother gave him a protective nature.

"I just needed some sleep. I basically passed out on the couch for six hours when I got home." He smiled at his friend.

"You sure that's all it is?" Don asked.

"Listen, thanks for your concern, but I really am fine!"

"Oh I'm not concerned." He joked, standing up he walked to the door. "Take care of yourself Dan."

"Yeah." He said with a smile looking up at him.

When Don disappeared from the office, Danny rested his elbows on his desk, rubbing his head when he heard a soft dripping sound. Looking down at the papers in front of him he saw small drops of blood.

"Damnit." He said pulling a Kleenex out of the box off Lindsay desk and wiped the blood from his paperwork. Stuffing one under his nose, he saw that he was bleeding heavier then yesterday. Turning his back to his open office door, he buried his face in his hands, hoping the blood would stop. "What the hell is happening to me!" He said to himself sopping up the blood the beeded down his chin.

* * *

Lindsay walked into her apartment after a day of hustling around the city, she dropped her bags at the door and took her coat off. Seeing the light on their answering machine she walked across the room and hit the play button and carried her things into the kitchen while she listened. Most of the calls weren't important until she heard the last.

"Hey Lindsay, it's Sheldon. I called an old friend at Mercy and he set up an appointment for an MRI tomorrow afternoon, I thought you might like to be there. Give me a call when you get this." The beep of the machine ended the call, and Lindsay's heart was beating so hard against her ribcage, she had to hold the counter to make sure she was hearing correctly. 'An MRI?' She thought to herself. Grabbing the phone she dialled Sheldon's number as fast as her finger's would work.

"Hawkes?" He answered after two rings.

"Why does Danny need an MRI?" Her voice shook.

"Hi, Lindsay. I take it you got my message?" He said, sensing her fear. "It's probably nothing, I just want to get him looked at."

"He said it's just a head ache. Is he not telling me something?" She has to sit down for fear her legs would give out.

"Lindsay-" He tried to calm her, but it wasn't working.

"Sheldon, talk to me." She begged.

"He was having trouble standing yesterday and with the head aches and nosebleeds, I just want to be cautious."

"Nose bleeds?"

"He didn't tell you?"

"Clearly!" She said sarcastically.

"Everything is fine, I just want to get him checked out. I promise, everything will be fine." Lindsay took a deep breath, as he continued. "I gotta go, Linds. Talk to Danny."

"I will." She said ending the call, as Danny opened the door and came into the apartment.

"Hey babe." He said putting his bag down and removing his shoes. Lindsay didn't know what to say to him so she stared at him, looking on the verge of tears. "What's wrong?"

"You're having an MRI tomorrow?" She asked, Danny put his hands on his hips and shook his head.

"Yeah, Sheldon's idea."

"You didn't tell me you've been having nosebleeds. When did they start?" Frozen in her position, she couldn't move.

"Yesterday. Look, he's just being over protective and-" He tried to explain but Lindsay cut him off.

"He's not being over protective Danny! Stop it! Stop lying to me!" She yelled, slamming her fist on the counter in front of her.

"Lindsay, calm down!" He said walking towards her with his hands out as if surrendering.

"No! What's wrong with you?" She yelled, tears now falling from her eyes.

"I don't know! OK? I don't know what's wrong with me! And to tell you the truth, I'm terrified!" He finally admitted out loud. Throwing his hands up in frustration, he turned away from Lindsay before she could see his eyes fill with tears.

"We'll figure this out." Lindsay said after a minute of silence. Walking up behind him she wrapped her arms around his chest. "Don't shut down. Talk to me."

"I'm sorry." Danny whispered putting his hands on hers. Dropping his chin to his chest, he held onto her.

"What's going on? What has Sheldon so worried?" She asked, resting her cheek against his back.

"I've been having some trouble, he thinks it's neurological." Danny said, holding his eyes closed.

"I want to come with you tomorrow."

"I want you to be there." He admitted, turning around and pulling her into a hug.


	3. Chapter 3

The ceiling above his bed seemed to be getting farther and farther away as Danny lay awake in his warm, comfortable bed with Lindsay beside him. As exhausted as he was, fear kept him awake in the late hours of the night. Shifting his hips in bed he heard felt his sleeping bed mate stir.

"Danny, you awake?" Lindsay whispered.

"Yeah, go back to sleep." He whispered back as Lindsay turned over slowly, wrapping her body around his. Danny brushed the hair back from her face as she settled on his chest.

"Can't sleep?" She asked, her eyes still closed.

"Don't worry about it." He whispered, placing a kiss on her forehead.

"Do you have another head ache?"

"I'm fine, go back to sleep." He denied, feeling something was wrong and not being able to explain it was one thing, but when the person you love notices is another story.

"I know you're scared, but everything is going to be fine. I promise, the MRI will be clear and this is just going to be a bad head cold." Lindsay said sitting up on her elbows and looking at him in the eye.

Letting out a deep breath he looked at her, she was half asleep and was still beautiful. "Yeah." He said blankly.

"What?" She questioned with a slightly annoyed face.

"What about you? Are you doing OK?" He asked, changing the subject, raising his eye brow.

"Danny, please, stop worrying about me. The only think I have to worry about is what would mix best with chocolate and pickels. You can talk to me?" She was pleading, he hated when she pleaded.

"First off, that's disgusting. And secondly, I know you don't worry, but I do. Everyday." He pushed himself, pushing the pillows under she shoulders.

"Why?" Resting her chin on her hands across his chest was the most comfortable position she could muster with her awkward belly.

"I'm just afraid something is going to happen to you, or the baby. I've screwed enough up, I don't want to screw this up." He said, closing his eyes for the last part.

"You're such a drama queen." Lindsay said dryly. Danny opened his eyes and smiled at her.

"Shut up." He joked.

"I'm fine, you'll be fine, the baby is fine. For once, lets just believe that we too can have a happy ever after. Please?" She said slowly pulling herself up to Danny level.

"I think I can do that." He said kissing her gently.

"Good." She said kissing him again. "Now try and get some sleep." With a smile, she rolled herself over and pull her pillow under her chin.

Danny watched her as he turned to rest himself along her side, the movements causing a stabbing pain in his side of his skull. Trying hard to mask his gasp in pain, he rested his hand on his the side of his head, as he eyes began to water from the pain.

"You Ok?" Lindsay asked, feeling his body stiffen.

"Go to sleep, I'll be back." He said as he hazily got out of bed, leaving a very confused Lindsay watching him as he walked into the bathroom and shut the door.

"Dan?" He heard Lindsay calling him from bed.

"Gimme a sec Linds, I'm fine." He lied. The pain didn't stop, turning on the water he looked up into the mirror, shocked by his appearence. Rushing cool water over his face, breathing deeply to calm his heart, he dried his face and sat down on the side of the tub, he sat with one hand on his head and the other over his stomach as nausea did a dance in his stomach.

"Danny, you alright?" He heard Lindsay banging on the door. Danny sucked in a breath as he got up and slowly made his way to the door, stopping in front and resting his forehead against it. "Danny, open up." Lindsay begged.

Opening the door, Lindsay gasped at the sight of him, he was pale and had large circles under his eyes. "What the hell?" She said angrily.

"Nothing gets past you." Danny said turning back to the tub and sitting back down.

"What happened?" She said pulling a cloth from the cabinet and wetting it in the sink.

"The pain is back." He said putting his head back.

"No, lean forwards." Lindsay said handing him fresh tissue and putting the cold wash cloth on the back of his neck, as she rubbed his back. He closed his eyes, as the pain began to subside.

"Maybe we should go to the hosptial?" Lindsay was genuinely worried, Danny could hear it in her voice.

"No... it's the middle of the night, you should go back to bed." He said, realized nausea was now very present in his system.

"Danny, this is getting ridiculous, you need to see a doctor." She practically begged.

"Please don't yell at me right now, my head is killing me." He begged, pressing his eyes closed, hoping his sickness would pass. It didn't, his stomach bubbled and within seconds, he found himself retching in toilet, luckily it wasn't far.

"Danny, oh god!" Lindsay said watching him, as she rubbed his back.

Sitting on the floor with his back to the wall, Lindsay wiped his face with the cloth that had been on his neck.

"Water." He breathed with his eyes shut, holding his abdomen.

"Ok, sit tight." Lindsay said standing slowly and getting water from the sink. "Danny, we should go to the hospital." She said handing him the water, when his hand came up weakly from the floor, she moved it to his lips and helped him swallow some.

"No, no hospital." He said finally opening his eyes and looking up at Lindsay, seeing his blood shots eyes.

"Have you been sick like this before?" She asked, feeling his face, his heat was flaming off of him.

"Once." He closed his eyes again, taking deep breaths he could feel his heart beating painfully against his chest.

"This is stupid, we're going to the hospital." Getting up from the floor in front of Danny she sat on the side of the tub.

"It's four A.M. I don't want you out this time of night." He finished as another spell of sickness hit him.

"Ah! This is bullshit!" She said leaving the bathroom. In the bedroom, Lindsay moved around the bed to Danny's phone and called the one person he wouldn't be able to say no to.

"Flack?" He answered quickly.

"Hey Don. It's Lindsay." Her voice was shakey.

"What's goin' on, Linds? You know it's four A.M. right?" He joked.

"I'm sorry, but I need your help." Her voice cracked on the word 'help' and she could feel tears threatening to form in her eyes.

"It's OK, I'm working anyways. What's wrong?" He was now scared.

"It's Danny, something is wrong with him and he won't let me take him to the hospital."

"What do you mean?" Don stood up from his desk, and began putting his coat on.

"He's sick Don, he needs help." Finally succeeding in breaking, her tears began to fall.

"Alright, I'm on my way. Just sit tight." Don picked up his keys and left his desk.

Lindsay hung up the phone and went into the bathroom to find that Danny had not moved. Putting her hand on his forehead she noticed his temperature was back to normal.

"Who was that?" He said, barely audible as he kept his eyes shut with his head leaning back against the wall.

"Don. He's going to take you to the hospital." Standing up Lindsay picked up another cloth and began wetting it.

"Everything is going to be fine, Linds. I promise." His voice was slurred. Lindsay turned back to him, seeing that his eyes were still closed and she wiped her own tears from her face. "I have to be at work for eight, I should be back for then."

"Danny, you're not going to work tomorrow." Lindsay said, cleaning his face with the cloth.

"She's thirteen, someone has to be looking for her." He babbled.

"What are you talking about?" She said, wiping his neck.

"Her parents didn't even claim her. No one even knows she's dead. Why?" He finally opened his eyes, looking up at a very confused Lindsay.

"I don't know." She said putting a hand on his cheek.

"I have to help her, I can't let them get away with this." His eyes were glossed over, he couldn't stop looking around the room, Lindsay shook him a bit.

"Danny, look at me." She said, shaking him. He couldn't concentrate.

"I have to go." Danny attempted to stand.

"What are you doing?" Grabbing his arm, as he fumbled around trying to stand.

"I have to go." He mumbled, as he walked out of the bathroom, using the wall as support. Half way into the room, his legs shook and he fell to his knees.

"Danny!" Lindsay moved to his side.

"The water was so cold... she didn't have a chance." He wasn't making sense, Lindsay could see his hands shaking sitting on his knees.

"Baby, you need help. We're going to the hospital." She said as she saw the dark red line form and fall from his nose. "Damnit." Still holding the cloth, she put it under his nose.

Hearing a knock at the door, she got to her feet and ran to the front door.

"Don!" She said swinging the door open and pulling him into a hug. Tears ran down her face, Flack put his hands on her shoulders and looked at her.

"Hey, what's going on?"

"Something is wrong! He needs help!" She cried.

"What happened?" He said, entering the apartment and closing the door behind him.

Taking a deep breath through her sobs, she withdrew a breath and explained. "He's been getting these head aches, and nose bleeds. Tonight it got worse and he is rambling and he can't stand up!" As the moved into the bedroom they saw that Danny hadn't moved from the floor where she left him.

"Dan, buddy? You alright?" Don said, putting a hand on his shoulder.

"Don?" He looked up confused. Don saw right away that this was worse then he thought, Danny's eyes were dazed, he was covered in a cold sweat. Blood was slowly dripping down his chin, the cloth Lindsay had given him hanging loosly in his sagging hand.

"You're going to be alright, man." He said seeing goose bumps ripple across Danny's arms in his t-shirt. "Hey, Linds. Grab me his sweater." He put out his hand as Lindsay placed one in his hand. Wrapping it around his body, Don pulled Danny to his feet. "We're going to the hospital."

"OK." Danny said as his knees shook. He was weaker then Don had enticipated at he put his arm around his shoulder and walked him to the front door where Lindsay helped put his shoes on.

"Everything is going to be alright." Don said, as Lindsay held the door as Don led a barely conscious Danny out the door on their way to the hospital.


	4. Chapter 4

When they arrived at the hospital, Danny was taken in to be examined right away, Lindsay had gone with him leaving Don in the waiting area. Being too nervous to sit down, he leaned against the wall waiting for any word from Lindsay. After an hour, the doors slowly opened as Lindsay slowly walked out.

"How's he doing?" Don asked, motioning for her to take a seat.

"They gave him a sedative, and they are taking him up stairs for a cat scan." She explained sitting down slowly.

"A sedative?" Don asked bending down on one knee to be at Lindsay's level.

"Yeah he's altered. He kept talking about the victim, he's completely out of it." She rested a hand on her belly and rubbed it in circular motions.

"Did he hit his head or something?" He asked.

"I don't think so, I couldn't help but feel that the doctors were hiding something."

"Maybe I should call Mac?" Don asked, standing up and pulling his phone out of his pocket. "I'm just going outside to call, get me if you hear anything." Lindsay gave him a nod, Don put a hand on her shoulder. "He's going to be fine."

"I know." She smiled.

Don left, leaving Lindsay alone with her thoughts, which at the moment, were anything but comforting. An image of her raising their child alone floated in and out of her head, and she shook it off, praying it would never come to that. Her hands were shaking so bad she could barely brush hair from her face, as Don came back in from outside.

"I got a hold of him, he said if you need anything to call him."

"Thanks Don." She said as Don sat down next to her and took her hand and held it tight.

"So, now what?" He asked.

"Now we wait." And they did.

* * *

After two hours went by, Lindsay had fallen asleep on Don's shoulder, as Don's head rested against the wall behind him, when a Doctor came and woke them.

"Ms. Monroe?" She shook Lindsay gently. She slowly opened her eyes to find an older woman with white hair in blue scrubs standing in front of her.

"Hi, um..." She cleared her throat. "Any news?" She rubbed her eyes as Don woke up.

"Come with me." She said, holding a hand to help her up.

"Why? What's wrong?" Lindsay felt her heart miss a beat.

"We've admitted Mr. Messer. He's resting comfortably upstairs."

"Admitted him? Why?" Don asked, standing behind Lindsay.

"I'd prefer to speak with you in private." The doctor said, her tone making both Lindsay and Don nervous, as Don put his hands on Lindsay's shoulders.

"OK." They said together, as they followed the doctor.

A couple of minutes later, they entered Danny's room, seeing him asleep with an I.V. in his arm they had to remind themselves to breath as the doctor turned on a light board.

"So what's going on with him?" Lindsay asked.

"I'm Dr. Reese, I am a neurologist, I've been working on Danny." She looked up at Don. "I'd prefer to speak with you alone."

"No, it's alright. Please, just tell me what's going on?" She couldn't take anymore.

"Mr. Monroe, I'm very sorry, but there is no easy way to tell you this..." She took a breath before putting some x-ray photos on the light board. "Danny has a significant sized tumor in his frontal lobe."

Lindsay heard herself gasp as she looked from Danny to Dr. Reese. "Oh my god." She could feel Don tense behind her as he squeezed her shoulder.

"He has probably been experiencing some difficulties for the last couple of months, things he may not have even noticed until it got to a certain size." She explained, showing her the picture of his brain.

"A couple of months?" Lindsay asked, holding her hand over her mouth.

"Yes. It does account for the symptoms he's been facing. The nosebleeds especially, see here." She pointed again, "It looks like it is pressing against his sinus cavity above his eyes. He has probably also been experiencing head aches, nausea and vomiting, behavioral and cognitive problems, maybe even light seizures. That could be why he was having trouble standing tonight."

"What... is there... is there anything we can do?" Lindsay asked, unable to speak properly as tears fell down her cheeks.

"We have a couple more tests we need to perform, it may be possible to remove the tumor, but we have to be certain." She explained.

"Is it cancer?" Don asked, the thought hadn't crossed Lindsay's mind until now.

"We don't know. We're going to be doing a biopsy today and find out if it is cancerous, but seeing how fast it is growing there is a good chance that's what we are dealing with." Dr. Reese, put a hand on Lindsay's shoulder. "But we will cross that bridge when we come to it."

"OK." Lindsay said, finding her voice was hard as she sucked in air.

"I'll be back to check on him in a couple hours, and to take him for the biopsy. Why don't you try and get some rest while he is under sedation." She said as she moved to leave the room.

"Thank you, Dr. Reese." Lindsay said, offering a painful smile. Smiling back, she turned and left the room.

"Come 'ere." Don said pulling Lindsay into a hug. Feeling her body sob in his arms, his heart broke.

"I should have made him come sooner." Don heard her say in a muffled cry.

"You couldn't have known. He's here now, that's what matters." Don held on letting her cry.

"What am I going to do? I can't loose him Don, I can't!"

"We won't, he's not going anywhere." He said, as he let her go. "Sit with him, I'm going to call Mac."

"Maybe we shouldn't... you know, until we know more?" She said, wiping her face.

"You sure?"

"Yeah, let's wait until Danny knows to let everyone else know." She said, taking a spot beside him bed and holding his hand. She had never seen him look so weak and small, the thought of that scared her.

"Alright." Don said standing at the end of the bed, "If anyone can beat a tumor, it's Danny." He said out loud, talking more to himself then Lindsay.

Kissing his hand, Lindsay gave nod and watching Danny sleep.

* * *

The sun has rose as Lindsay sat at the window of Danny's hospital room, Don had left hours before when he was called to a scene. The silent sound of heart monitors and of Danny breathing, Lindsay nearly fell asleep when she heard ruffling of blankets. Turning around she saw his eyes slowly opening.

"Hey." Lindsay said standing and moving to the seat beside his bed.

"Where am I?" He asked groggily.

"The hospital, what do you remember?" She asked, taking his hand.

"I... I don't know, the bathroom and... and then I don't know." He looked around the room, bringing his hand to his eyes, he rubbed them unconscious he was doing so.

"Danny, there's something we have to talk about." She said, trying to stay strong was harder then she thought.

"What? Is it the baby?" Looking at her, she realized Dr. Reese was right, there was no easy way to tell him.

"No, the baby is fine. Danny, you... you're sick." She couldn't seem to find the words.

"What do you mean?" He smiled at her, letting her know she could tell him, he was ready to hear what he had been scared to hear for weeks.

"You have a brain tumor." She said it quickly, almost as if she spit it out. Danny didn't respond, he just looked away from her. "I'm sorry. Dr. Reese says they are going to do more tests, they may be able to remove it."

"But they might not, right?" He said glumly.

"Hey, look at me." Moving to the bed beside him, she squeezed his hand tighter. "We'll get through this."

Danny finally looked at her, his face was blank of emotion. "If anything happens, you won't be alone. Flack will be there, my parents aren't far and I set up an account a while back for the baby, so you won't have to worry." He rambled.

"Don't talk like that, we don't even know how bad it is yet." Lindsay begged.

"Yet. I don't want you to stress, you'll be taken care of." He looked up at Lindsay and found that she had tears in her eyes.

"You think that's what I'm worried about? Me and money?" Loosening her grip on his hand, Danny looked confused. "What am I supposed to do without you?"

"Lindsay-" He shifted in bed.

"No, don't start writing your Will and don't say that I'm going to be fine without you. I don't want to live without you! I don't want to raise this baby without you! Don't give up before you even get the chance to fight!" She yelled, dropping his hand and standing up, covering her mouth, Danny saw she was crying.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I don't know what I'm thinking." He put out his hand, hoping she'd come back. "I'm scared, and I just.... I'm sorry." She took his hand, but this time, she pulled him into her and held him.

"I'm not going anywhere." Danny rested his head against she shoulder, feeling her pregnant belly against his body he closed his eyes.

"Promise?"

"Yeah, I promise." Lindsay said, kissing the top of his head.


	5. Chapter 5

After hours of tests and rounds of medication, Danny was again resting comfortably in his hospital bed, Lindsay had tried, but couldn't fall asleep as she waited for the results. Closing her eyes, she rested her hands on her stomach as she put her head back against the chair. The baby suddenly jolted, tickling her awake. Letting out a soft giggle, she looked up seeing Danny waking up.

"You OK?" He asked rubbing his eyes.

"The baby is kicking." She smiled standing up and sitting on the side of the bed. Danny pulled himself into a sitting position as Lindsay picked up his hand she rested it on her stomach where their baby was moving.

"Wow." Danny smiled, looking at Lindsay as she giggled. "He's a mover." He said as he left his hand, feeling their baby.

"Or she." Lindsay corrected as she leaned forward and kissed him gently.

"Maybe he'll be a nerd like his Mom." Danny said through a laugh.

"Yeah, or a dick like her Dad." She laughed.

"Ouch." He scoffed. Laughing had never felt so good, over the last couple of days, sarcasm was harder to accomplish as he felt worse then death. Lindsay rested a hand on his chest, watching Danny her smile slowly fell. Though she wasn't frowning, the mood was about to become serious once again.

"How are you feeling?"

Danny reached his hand up and ran his fingers over the bandage at the side of his head. "Pretty doped up to tell you the truth." He smiled hazily up at her.

"Doctor says you might be able to go home soon. He is just waiting for the biopsy to come back and for the meds to wear off before he'll make a decision." Brushing his hair with her free hand, Danny shut his eyes enjoying the sensation.

"Is it too late to hope it's just the flu?" He silently prayed this was all a dream.

"I think we might be past that." She smiled warmly.

"Maybe you should call Mac." He said, looking her in the eyes.

"Not yet." She said without looking at him, as she continued to brush his hair.

"Why?" Danny opened his eyes. "He should know."

"Wait until we know more." Danny reached her hand and squeezed it in hers.

"Look, this whole thing, it sucks. But I don't want you to go through this alone. You should tell the team." He smiled, being strong for her was easier then he thought.

"I'm not alone Danny, and neither are you." She put an arm around her belly.

"You know what I mean. What if I do end up needing surgery?" He stared at her, the word 'surgery' he could see her flinch. "We both know it's a possibility, and if it comes to that... you may not be in the right state of mind. I'm begging you, call Mac." His eyes were sincere, she knew that this wasn't him being scared, it was him genuinely worried about her.

"Don't say stuff like that." She still refused to may eye contact.

"I have to." Puling her hands towards him, he made her look him in the eye. "If something happens, and I won't come back myself, I need someone there to make the call. I love you, and I promise I will fight this anyway that I can, but you need to be realistic about this."

"Danny-" She tried to protest.

"No, I can't put that decision on you alone. Please, just call him." Closing his eyes he rested his forehead against hers, as she put her hand on the back of her neck holding him steady.

"I don't deserve you, you know that?" Feeling his hand on her arm..

"Yeah, you're pretty lucky." He smiled as Lindsay kissed him.

"I'll call him."

"Thank you." He said, taking a deep breath. Moving to leave, Danny pulled her close again. "Maybe you can call him later." Shifting, he moved to lay down, bringing Lindsay with him. Nuzzling under his chin, Danny wrapped his arms around her. "I may be sick, but I will always protect you." He said kissing her forehead.

"I love you."

"Right back at cha." Danny said, as Lindsay closed her eyes and fell asleep for the first time in nearly two days.

* * *

Sitting at his desk, Don went over the events of the previous night. The icy cold words of the doctor bouncing around his head like a bullet; every time he closed his eyes he saw Danny's glossy eyes staring up at him from his bedroom floor. The fear in his heart, that he had been too late to help his friend. Lost in thought he didn't notice someone calling his name, not until he felt a hand on his shoulder was he startled back to reality.

"Flack, you alright?" Mac asked seeing him jump.

"Yeah..." Rubbing his eyes he, straightened himself out "What's going on?" He asked, standing up.

"Hawkes just got a hit in CODIS on the DNA found at the scene, looks like the girl had a brother."

"Good, good. Do we have an address?" He was clearly elsewhere.

"You wanna tell me what's going on?" Mac asked, in a demanding tone.

"Nothin'... no, nothing is going on." He lied.

"Lindsay called in and said Danny can't make it in this morning."

"Yeah. She told me." He said looking away.

"Something about Danny you're not telling me? Is he in trouble?" Don flinched at his name, unsure of what he should tell him, he bounced on his heels.

"No, nothing like that." Mac wasn't buying what he was selling.

"Don, if Danny is involved with something I should know about, I'm going to find out eventually. Do yourself a favour and let me in on what's going on, and maybe I can help him." Mac assumed the worst.

"There is nothing you can do. There is nothing any of us can do." Don said, sitting down in his chair, resting his head on his hands.

"What do you mean?" Mac rested himself on the desk opposite Don, suddenly worried at the vacant expression his friend wore.

"It's not my place." He began.

"I care about Danny, as much as you do. What the hell is going on?" Realizing he may have been wrong about Danny's sudden absence he felt his heart race.

"He... ah, how do I even say it?" Don stiffled a laugh. Looking up from his hands he looked Mac in the eyes. "Danny has a brain tumor."

Mac felt ill, his face sunk, and his heart missed a beat. At loss for words, he looked away unsure of what to do or say.

"Ah... how... what?" He stumbled on his words.

"He collapsed last night, Lindsay called me and we took him to the hospital. Apparently there have been symptoms for months, we just didn't notice them until they got bad." Don's voice broke, but he covered it with a cough.

"How bad?" He asked, sheepishly.

"They did more tests today, Lindsay said she'd call." He finished. Sitting in silence, both men stared at their feet gathering the information they had shared.

"I'm sorry." Mac said after a couple minutes of silence.

"It's alright. We both know Danny, I can't say I wouldn't have reacted the same." Don said with a warm smile.

"He's going to be alright. He's Danny." Mac said, more to himself then to Don.

"Yeah." Don said nodding his head as he stood up and put his jacket on. "So this brother?"

Mac stood up, clearing his throat he explained the information as they left the station, both with thoughts of Danny in the back of their mind.


	6. Chapter 6

Danny sat awake rubbing Lindsay's back as she lay asleep in his arms, the I.V. tubing in his arm was beginning to itch but whatever they were giving him seemed to be doing the trick. The throbbing pain in his head was no longer present but was replaced with a warm fuzzy sensation of the meds. Staring hazily off to the ceiling, he was pulled back to reality when Dr. Reese came back into the room.

"Danny, how are you feeling?" She asked as Danny put his finger over his mouth to quiet her. Lindsay was still asleep. "Oh, sorry." She began to whisper. "I have the results back."

"I'm awake." Lindsay mumbled as she sat up in bed, rubbing her eyes she stepped off the side and leaned against the side.

"I know it's late, but I'd like to have a minute with you." Pulling a chair out she sat down, folding her hands over the clip board in her lap. Danny felt goose bumps dance around his skin as Lindsay picked up his hand squeezing it in a comforting way.

"What are we dealing with here?" Danny asked impatiently.

"Danny, I'm sorry, the cells from your biopsy are malignant. If we don't start treatment soon, the conditions with only worsen as the tumor grows and we don't want to risk it spreading somewhere else."

"What's the treatment?" Danny asked promptly, Lindsay could feel him shaking.

"We are going to do some more MRI's and then start some radiation treatments. If we can, we'd like to remove the tumor." Her voice was surprisingly soothing.

"When do we start?" He asked, Lindsay squeezed his hands tighter.

"We have to start today. Once we get the results of the MRI, I'll consult a Neurosurgeon and find out best course of action." She said letting out a low breath. Danny nodded, suddenly he had no words.

"You said worsen, how?" Lindsay asked.

"Well as the tumor grows, they symptoms may become life threatening. They may start as behaviour problems, you may find that you cannot control what you say or do. There will be seizures, they will start occurring more frequently. You may also run the risk of blood clots in your brain and stroke." She explained. Watching the horrified look on both of their faces, she stood up. "We are going to do anything we can, and we are going to beat this." She smiled.

"Th...thank you, Dr. Reese." Danny said, noticing how weak his voice was.

"I have some tests to order, a nurse will come and get you when radiology is ready." Turning she left the room, stopping at the door. "You're lucky you came in when you did, or this conversation could have been a lot worse."

"Yeah, lucky me." Danny forced a smile, as she left. Lindsay turned around and pulled him into a hug, letting his arms leg at his side, she held him tight.

"We'll beat this." She said as Danny closed his eyes.

"Linds?" He said, as she let him go and looked at him.

"Call my parents, tell them to come here. I want to tell them face to face." He was holding it together a little too well, Lindsay was nervous.

"And Mac?"

"Yeah... you should call Mac. He might be worried. Or Don, no call Flack." Danny turned and stood up off the bed and walked to the window. "Mac will probably have to transfer someone from the other shift to work because I might not be back to work for awhile. With you gone too, he'll be short handed. Then again, maybe you shouldn't tell Mac, they might be too distracted." He babbled.

"He would want to know, Danny. Its not about being short handed, it's about being there for a friend." Lindsay walked up behind him and wrapped her arms around his chest.

"He might have to hire a replacement if I can't come back to work." His expression was blank, he was in shock of the recent news and didn't want to think about anything else but work.

"You'll be back, and better then ever." She rested her cheek against his back.

"What if I'm not? What if I end up a babbling gork in a nursing home for the rest of my life? I can't live like that. I won't."

"Danny-" She tried to interject, but there was no point.

"No! No! Stop it!" He said pulling his hands off of him. "Can you stop being so fucking glass half full!"

"I didn't mean it like-" She moved to put her hands on him, but he pulled away.

"Don't you get it? I'm sick! I might die Lindsay, and I just want you to acknowledge that! Please! Not everything is going to be OK. I have a fucking tumor for god sakes!" He yelled, putting his hands to his head he pressed him fingers into his temples. "Ah, god!" He yelped in pain as another head ache forced it's way painfully into his head. Doubling in pain, Lindsay ran to him and put a hand on his shoulder, only to he pushed away by Danny. Not hard, but enough for her to get the picture 'he needed to be alone.'

"I'll get a nurse." She said as he sat down beside the window and held his head.

Lindsay made it outside his door before she started to cry. Pushing her back against the wall she covered her mouth to mask her sobs, she no longer knew how to be strong for Danny and she wasn't sure she could fake it. After a moment, she straightened herself out and walked to the nurses station as she talked to a middle aged woman named Margret that she had spoken with over the day she felt a strong hand on her shoulder.

"Hey Linds." Mac said as she turned around to see the entire team standing before her. "We didn't think you should be alone." He finished, as Mac stepped towards her. There were no words for the graditude she felt for them, breaking down she let Mac hold her. Burying her face into his shoulder, she knew that she wasn't going to be alone through this. After some time and many hugs, Lindsay wiped her tears and explained what the doctor had told them.

"So where is Danny now?" Don asked, sitting down next to her.

"In his room, he seemed like he needed to be alone. He's having a hard time being the one that needs to be taken care of." She explained.

"Maybe I should talk to him?" He asked.

"No, just give him some time Don. When he is ready, he needs time to process what's going on." Mac explained.

"Is there anything we can do?" Stella asked, putting a hand on Lindsay's back.

"Yes, there is actually." Lindsay pulled out a notebook from her sweater pocket. "You need to get Danny's parents and bring them down here. Danny wants to tell them in person." She pulled a slip of paper off and wrote down their address and handed it to Stella.

"No problem." She said as her and Sheldon headed out to find the Messer's.

"What about you, Linds? When was the last time you ate something?" Mac asked in his regular Dad fashion.

"I had... um, a candy bar a couple hours ago. I'm not really hungry." She looked away sheepishly.

"Tell you what? Don will stay here close to Danny, and you and I are going to find something to eat." Mac said in a telling not asking kind of way. Lindsay smiled at him, as she held out her hand for help up. "Good." Mac took her hand and helped her up.

"Call if-" Lindsay turned back to Don as she walked away.

"You'll be the first to know." He smiled.

* * *

After Lindsay had left him a nurse came in within minutes with something for the pain, he was beginning to love that woman. Sitting in the chair by the window, he let the medicine do it's work. His toes tingled, his fingers danced on his knees as he watched cars pass, sending chills down his spine as light bounced around his room. Hearing a soft knock at the door, he slowly turned his head to see Don standing at the door.

"Hey buddy. Can I come in?" He asked shyly.

"I take it Lindsay told you?" Flack gave nod. Danny, shook his head, which caused his world to spin.

"You in pain?" Flack asked moving into the room and leaning against the window frame.

"Complete opposite actually. I can't feel a thing." He was dopey, he could feel his head sway.

"Stella and Hawkes headed out of get your folks. You sure you want to break the news? We can tell them." Folding his arms across his chest, he gave Danny a questionable look.

"No, my mother won't believe you. It has to be me. Besides, it gives me an opportunity to say goodbye."

"Dan-" Flack moved closer but Danny put his hand up to stop him.

"Please, just hear me out. No one is listening to me." He closed his eyes, and took a deep breath.

"OK, I'll listen." He settled himself onto the window sill.

"I know I am a downer, and that I should stay positive, I just can't imagine how much harder it will be on everyone if I say it's all going to work out fine and then something happens and I... die." He stumbled on the word. "I'm not ready, this is all happening so fast that I don't know what to think, but I know I have to prepare Lindsay if I don't wake up."

"If you go in there thinking it's the end, then there is no way you'll fight as hard." He pleaded.

"I'll fight, I will. Don, I need to ask you something?"

"What's that?"

"Please look out for my kid if... you know..." He trailed off.

"Danny, when you make it out of this, I'll be there for you. I will be there for Baby Messer too. No matter the out come, I got your back, always." He said holding his hand out.

Danny looked up at him with admiration, and reached his weak hand out and shook his hand. Standing up he gave his friend a hug, he hadn't realized how much he needed one until now. Breaking apart a small nurse came to the door with a wheel chair.

"Mr. Messer, they are ready for you in radiology." Her voice was small.

"Yeah, alright." He said slowly walking towards her. "Thanks, Don. Really." He said as he sat down in the chair.

"Any time." Don smiled as Danny was wheeled out of the room, leaving him alone.


	7. Chapter 7

"So how're you holding up?" Mac asked, as Lindsay took a bite out of her sandwich.

Finishing her bite, she answered. "I'm fine, it's stressful, but I know he is going to be alright. He's just scared." Her answer was without emotion as if she refused to think any thing negative.

"Course he's scare. I'm scared and I know you're scared." Mac said, as Lindsay looked up at him, he could tell she had a lot on her mind.

"I don't know how I didn't see it coming, I'm with him everyday." She said, shaking her head.

"Well I'm sure the fact that he is as stubborn as he is didn't help matters." He smiled as he continued to eat.

"If it weren't for Sheldon I wouldn't have known anything." She took another bite.

"His intuition was right, though I wish he wasn't." Mac sighed.

"The worst part is that he didn't even admit he was having trouble. With the head aches, nosebleeds and everything he hid it all so well. Not until he nearly collapsed that could I make him admit that there was something wrong. I understand not wanting me to worry, but he risked his own life because he has pride issues!" She was speaking so fast, Mac could barely keep up, he knew she needed to get things off of her chest. She leaned back putting her hands on the table. "I feel like I failed him."

"You didn't fail him and it's more then just pride, Lindsay. He doesn't want to be treated different because he is sick. He probably didn't want to believe he was struggling until it was too late." He said as he dropped his napkin over his plate.

"I don't know what I would do without you, Mac." She said, holding her hand out as he took it in his.

"We're a family, and we'll get through this as a family." He squeezed her hand for good measure.

"Thank you." She smiled and wiped her mouth with her napkin.

"Let's get back there and see how our boy is doing?" He said, standing up putting money down for the bill.

"Yeah." She said with a sigh. As she moved, both hands went to her belly. "Oh!"

"What? You alright?" Mac asked startled.

"Yeah. Feel this!" She said excitedly. Mac put his hand on her belly. "He's been moving so much today." Mac smiled as he felt her child moving around inside her belly.

"He's going to be a handful." He helped her stand and put her jacket on.

"Just like his Daddy." Lindsay wrapped her arms around her belly, and smiled, thinking about the family they were so close to having. Mac watched her for a moment, enjoying the momentary joy before they returned to the cold sinister hallways of the hospital.

"Come on." He said, putting a hand between her shoulder blades as he lead her out of the restaurant.

* * *

After multiple MRI's Danny was exhausted, Flack has sat by his side while he slept waiting for Lindsay and Mac to come back. Without realizing it, he had fallen asleep with his hand resting against his cheek.

"Excuse me, Sir?" He was startled as a young nurse stood as his side gently shaking him.

"Wh... sorry, what's going on?" He snapped awake quickly.

"I'm sorry about that." She paused as he took a second to open his eyes and come back to reality. "I have your colleagues outside. They have brought Mr. Messer's parents, should I tell them they can come in?"

"Ah, no. He's pretty wiped. I'll come out." He stood, and followed the young nurse to the door, where he could the Messer's, Stella and Sheldon waiting patiently.

"Don!" Mrs. Messer said, pulling him in for a hug.

"Hey, Mrs. M." He said while hugging her.

"Can someone please tell me what's going on?" Danny's father said, in a way that was only demanding.

"Danny wants to see you, but he's asleep at the moment." Don explained.

"Why is he here?" Mrs. Messer asked, a tone of fear in her voice. By saving grace Dr. Reese walked up behind them.

"Hi, I'm Dr. Reese, I'm treating your son." She said extending her hand to them.

"Can you tell us what is going on?" Mr. Messer said as he shook her hand.

"I'm going to talk to Danny first, then I'm willing to answer any of your questions." She said as she entered Danny's room and closed the door behind herself.

"What now?" Mrs. Messer asked, as she began to pace.

"Now we wait." Don replied as they took a long breath and began the wait.

* * *

Danny was still asleep as Dr. Reese entered his room, turning on the soft warm light on above Danny's bed. Opening his eyes slowly, he was momentarily disoriented as the room came into focus, seeing a shape above him as he began to wake.

"Danny?" She gently shook him as he rubbed his eyes awake.

"Dr. Reese?" He asked as she moved his bed into a better position.

"Danny, I'd like to talk to you about your results. Would you like some water?" She asked as she filled a cup.

Clearing his throat he gave a nod and ran his hands over his face. "Yes, thank you." He answered. Taking the water, he slowly sipped it as Dr. Reese settled into the chair beside the bed.

"Danny, I have consulted with Dr. Malten, who is the Chief of the Neurology Department, we have looked over the MRI's and there is a good chance we will be able to remove the tumor."

"I'm sensing a 'but' here." He said with a concerned look.

"But," She looked at her chart for a moment, as if going over her words in her head. "the risks are high."

"How high?" Danny asked, scratching the back of his neck.

"If we remove the tumor, you may experience be personality changes, as well as-" He cut her off.

"Vision loss, memory loss and communication problems, right?" He filled in the blanks.

"That is a possibility, but if all goes well you will be rid of the tumor with no complications at all. Then you can continue with the radiation treatment." She folded her hands over her lap.

"And what are those chances exactly? One in ten? One in a million?" He was angry.

"There is a twenty percent chance that the operation with be a success." His heart sunk.

"And without the surgery?" His voice broke.

"With radiation treatment we can shrink-"

"How long?" He interrupted. Dr. Reese, took a deep breath and looked him in the eyes.

"Six to eight months."

"So I'll get to be there for the birth of my child?" He asked, as tears came to his eyes.

"Yes." She looked down.

"Over those months, will I be able to function?" His head was swimming with questions, but he was unsure if he actually wanted to hear the answers.

"Things will get worse on a daily basis. In the end it will be very painful. As the tumor grows it will be pressing on your motor functions so you will begin to have trouble walking and with most cases, paralysis occurs." She stood up and put a hand on his arm. "I'm sorry."

"Either way I'm screwed then?" He said dryly with a smile.

"We can risk the surgery, or continue with radiation treatment and take our chances on the tumor shrinking. I'm going to give you some time to think about it and talk it over with Lindsay." Dr. Reese, held his arm and smiled warmly at him, he suddenly realized the warmth she carried with her.

"Thank you." His voice was low and damaged.

"I can speak with your family if you'd like?" She asked, squeezing his arm.

"I don't think I can, would you mind?" He rested his head against his pillow.

"Not at all." She turned to leave as Danny called after her.

"Dr. Reese?" He looked down and shook his head for a beat.

"Yes?"

"What's your name? I mean, you've seen my brain, and I don't even know your name." He asked with a smile, looking back at her.

"Rebecca." She answered, letting out a soft laugh.

"Thank you, Rebecca."

"Of course." She smiled as she left the room, when the door closed behind her, he heard his family asking question after question. After a couple of minutes he heard his mother scream out, Danny looked to the window as tears fell down his chin listening to his mother cry.


	8. Chapter 8

Lindsay and Mac had come back to the hospital as Dr. Reese was breaking down the latest information from test results. Danny's mother was sobbing uncontrollably as his father rocked her back and forth. Lindsay held Mac's hand and saw that most of the team had tears in their eyes.

"Dr. Reese, may I speak with you in private?" She asked, Dr. Reese smiled and gave her a nod. Lindsay let go of Mac's hand and followed Dr. Reese down the hallways to a room out of the way from his mother's sobs. Once the door closed, she began her questions.

"How's Danny taking this?" She put her hands on her belly in a protective way.

"He seems to be confused. I'm not sure what he plans to do treatment wise." Noticing, Lindsay was shaking she pulled a chair out for her to sit down on.

"Well surgery is the best choice, is it not?" She gratefully sat down.

"From a medical stand point, yes. But on a personal one, I'm not so sure."

"I don't understand. If you remove the tumor, then he won't-" Dr. Reese put up her hand to stop Lindsay.

"If we remove the tumor and everything goes 100%, then yes, it was a good choice and he would potentially be fine. But if something goes wrong and he isn't himself, then is it worth it? What if he comes out of this and looses his ability to communicate? Looses his memories of you? That's the risks that Danny has to consider right now."

"It's better then loosing him completely!" Tears marked their way down Lindsay's cheeks.

"Lindsay," She dropped down to one knee, to look her in the eyes, "he wants to hold his baby, and remember you. I understand him not wanting to miss that opportunity."

"I don't know what to do?" She admitted.

"Help him decide, let it be his choice, and be there for him." She took Lindsay's hands in hers and squeezed them. There was nothing left to say, as she gave her a nod in reply and wiped the tears from her face and left the room to go back to Danny.

* * *

Danny was more then happy that Lindsay had gone back home and gotten him his own clothes for his stay at the hospital. With his jogging pants in hooded sweat shirt, he felt more at home then in the stiff hospital gowns and house coats. Laying in the bed he felt sick, once he stood up and walked around his room he felt better, finding his place in the chair beside the window he sat with his feet up on the table beside him, closest thing to a lounge chair that he could fake. Picking up one of the magazines Lindsay had left there he began to flip through looking through all the pictures.

"Hey." He heard a small voice coming from the door, looking up he saw Lindsay standing there, looking uncomfortable and nervous.

"I won't bite." He smiled.

"I... I know." She wouldn't look at him directly.

"I take it you talked to Dr. Reese?" He said holding out his hand for her to come over to him.

"Yeah I did... I don't want to pressure you. It's your choice." She said as she slowly made her way across the room.

"We both know that's not true." He said as she took his hand.

"What do you want to do?" She danced around the question.

"Well, I'd like to go home, and stay in bed with you all day." Smiling, he slowly pulled her down into his lap and wrapped his arms around her waist.

"I wish I could close my eyes and all this would be a dream." She said wrapping her arms around his neck.

"Me too." He said, sucking in a long breath.

"I'm not too heavy am I?" She asked as he rested his hand on her stomach.

"Never." Closing his eyes he rested his head against her shoulder.

"What do you want to do?" She repeated hesitantly.

"I'm going to continue with the radiation treatment, and once the baby is born and I can hold her, or him, then we can see about surgery again."

"Are you sure you want to risk it?" Her voice shook.

"It's a bigger risk with surgery." He sighed. "I don't to loose who I am until I've met what we've created."

"OK." She answered, closing her eyes as a tear made its way down her cheek.

* * *

**One Month Later...**

Knocking at the door, Don stood waiting outside the apartment door for someone to answer, after a couple minutes he pulled his keys out and entered. The apartment was quiet, the living room was neat and tidy, and it was as if no one had lived there.

"Danny?" He called, hearing nothing he moved toward the bedroom and knocked on the door. "Dan, you in here buddy?"

"Yeah." He heard a weak voice from inside.

"How're you doin'?" Don asked, stepping into the room. It was completely dark apart from the slight glow from around the windows of the daylight.

"Can you close the door behind you?" He asked so quietly that Don barely heard him.

"No problem." He lowered his voice instinctively. "I picked up that prescription for you, you need some water?"

Danny let out a mumble in reply, as Don stepped beside the bed. Looking down at his friend he saw that Danny was curled up in blankets, laying on his side.

"How are you feeling?" Don put a comforting hand on his shoulder. Danny opened his eyes slowly and looked up to his friend, he looked sad and broken.

"Like shit, I have a headache today, but at least I'm me. Yesterday Lindsay said I was babbling like homeless person. I don't remember any of it." He admitted. After a minute, he rolled onto his back and tried to sit up, Don relented and helped him.

"You need anything?" He asked as he handed him a glass of water.

"A new body would be nice." He joked taking a sip.

"Lindsay was telling me that the last MRI showed the tumor was shrinking. That's good right?"

"Yeah." He looked down. Don noticed how skinny he had become in the past month. The radiation had effected his stomach, and he barely kept a meal down.

"What?" He asked, he could tell he had something on his mind.

"You know where Lindsay is right now?" He looked pained.

"Doctor's appointment."

"Exactly, another Doctor's appointment that I'm missing out on. I don't get to see her smile when she sees our child on the ultrasound. I don't get to see that." He reached for his head as a sharp ache of pain hit him.

"Whoa, Dan! Calm, just breath." Don said grabbing his shoulder.

"I can't just breath. God, I hate this! I hate what I've become!"

"It's not your fault, man. This is out of your control. Just keep fighting and you can beat it." He assured him, but nothing would work.

"I'm sick of fighting. I'm just so fucking tired, and I sick of people telling me that I'm going to be fine. Clearly I'm not! I wanted to be there when the baby is born but lately I can barely get out of bed. I'm not getting any better, I'm getting worse! So stop saying I can beat it!" He shook his head and looked at Don, he looked hurt. "I'm sorry. I... I'm-"

"S'alright. I won't be so positive next time." He smiled.

"Thanks for picking this up." He said holding the bottle of pills, turning the top, he struggled to open them.

"No problem." Taking the bottle, he opened them for him and gave him two pills. "Here." Danny gave him a weak smile. "What are those?"

"Nausea medication. If I don't eat again soon, I'm going to have to go back to the hospital." He explained swallowing the pills with some water.

"How long as it been since you last ate anything?"

"What day is it?" He smiled.

"I'll put on some soup, maybe that will help." He said, standing up and walking towards the door.

"Thanks, Don. You're a good friend."

"I know." He said closing the door behind himself, Danny laughed pulling the blankets up closer.

Running his hands over his head he scratched his scalp, only to find his hair coming out in clumps.

"What the fuck?" He gasped, the area where he was scratched was close to bare. "Oh my god." Shoving the blankets, he slowly stood up and walked to the bathroom. Flipping on the light, his head ached, but he forced his eyes open to look in the mirror. The image of himself sent chills down his body; his eyes were nearly purple from the circles under them, his skin was white as paper, and he was thinner then he has ever been. Turning his head he saw a bald spot on the back of his head.

"Great, that's just perfect!" He said out loud as the bedroom door opened.

"Danny?" Lindsay called looking for him. Opening the bathroom door she saw Danny standing in front of the mirror, he turned to avoid the bald spot on his head.

"You're back early." He tried to act as if nothing had happened.

"It was just a check up, everything looks good. Don said you might have some soup?"

"Yeah, maybe." He was smiling in a strange way. Lindsay could tell something was wrong.

"You alright?" She folded her arms over her chest and bounced on her heals.

"Ah... yeah, I think so." He slowly sat down on the side of the tub, he was tired standing on his feet.

"OK, I'll be out in the kitchen if you need anything. Are you going to have a shower?"

"Sure." He was elsewhere in his head. Trying to decide if he should shave his head with a razor or with electric razor which was much noisier.

"You sure you're alright?" She gave him a look so that he knew something was up.

"I need your help." He admitted.

"With what?" She asked as Danny turned his head, revealing the patch.

"I think its from treatment."

"Oh Danny, I'm sorry." She said walking towards him putting her hands on his neck. "What do you need me to do?"

"I never liked the nick name 'Patch'." He smiled uncomfortably.

"Then let's fix that." She kissed him as she plugged in the razor and wrapped a towel around his shoulders.

It didn't take long to buzz off the rest of the hair on his head, luckily he had a good shape. With his pale skin and his newly bald head, Lindsay noticed how blue his eyes were. Putting her hands on his cheeks she pulled him close so she could look closer.

"You look beautiful." She smiled.

"No one likes a liar." He closed his eyes, putting his hands onto of hers.

"I don't lie." Kissing him, she held his lips over hers for a minute before she opened her eyes.

"The baby is alright?" He asked standing up.

"She's good." She said with a smirk.

"She?" He said with excitement.

"Yeah, we're having a baby girl!" Danny pulled her in for a tight hug, she wrapped her hands around his neck squeezing him tight.

"I thought you wanted a surprise?" He asked still holding her.

"I think we're had enough surprises, don't you think?" Winking at him she stepped out of his arms, taking his hand she led him out of the bathroom. "Let's let Don feel us."

"Lindsay, wait." He pulled back on her hand, she turned and looked at him.

"What? What is it?" Her concerned face was back.

"I love you, I'd be dead without you." He smiled, and squeezed her hand.

"I love you too." She kissed him again, this time she wasn't as gentle. "You aren't going anywhere." Lightly giving his butt a smack she continued. "Now let's eat." Danny laughed and followed her out into the living room.


	9. Chapter 9

Over the weeks, the team had been busy working cases and tending to a sick Danny. Lindsay was busy pretending everything was fine as she had grown in size to a comfortable eight and half months. Stella knew she barely had time for herself and took it upon herself to give her a day. She sat patiently in the booth at the coffee shop, people around her we busy moving around their day as she waited for Lindsay to show. Planning for a day of light shopping, not too much walking, and some nice breakfast, she knew that Lindsay would appreciate the break. The waitress came by once again to ask if she needed anything as she saw Lindsay open the door and slowly waddle in.

"Hey Stel, I'm sorry I'm late, I'm slower then I think I am!" She said walking with her feet spread to the table.

"Wow, are you sure there is only one in there?" Stella joked as she stood up and gave her a hug.

"I'm starting to think there is a whole soccer team, not just one little girl!" She said as she separated. "How are you?" She asked as she sat down, looking very pregnant as she did.

"I'm fine, it's as if the lab is in the middle of a busy season with the amount of hours I've been putting in. I'm sorry I haven't been around much." Stella put her hands on Lindsay's as she smiled.

"No, no, don't worry. Between Danny's parents, my parents and doctor's appointments we're been so busy there isn't much time for anything else." She picked up a menu as the waitress walked over. Ordering their drinks, Stella looked up at Lindsay and smiled, seeing her glow as she ordered her tea.

"How is Danny doing anyways?" She asked as the waitress left, knowing it would come up eventually.

"He's better. I think. He says that he is feeling fine, but his body shows a different story." Setting down the menu, she closed her eyes. "To be honest, I can't tell anymore."

"How do you mean?"

"Well, I think the treatment is making him even more sick. It's good that he sleeps, at least that way he isn't in pain all day. I'm just worried about him, he should have had the surgery." She sighed loudly.

"He will, as soon as Baby Messer comes around." Stella reached across the table and put her hand on Lindsay's belly. As the baby kicked, Stella smiled widely.

"Oh, she likes you!" Lindsay laughed. "She has been so busy lately, it's as if she doesn't sleep." She traced circles around her stomach as she smiled down at the mound.

"Think of any names yet?" Stella couldn't help buy smile.

"Danny has some ideas, but I'm starting to think it's the pain killers talking."

"Why?" She said as the waitress sat down their drinks. "Oh thank you." She said to her.

"So far he's come up with, Ruth, Petunia, and Robin." She said naming them off of her fingers. Stella laughed, nearly spitting coffee out of her mouth. "Yeah, that's what I said." She laughed with her.

"What are your names?"

"I don't know, I want to see her first, then we'll decide." She smiled, but it was short lived as her face turned sour. "Oh." She said, sucking in a short breath.

"What? You alright?" Stella stiffened as Lindsay started breathing heavy.

"I think so, just... ah!" Bending forwards, Lindsay wrapped her arms around her stomach.

"Lindsay?" Stella jumped up from her chair and knelled down beside Lindsay. "Just breath, what's wrong?"

"Ah, it hurts! It... oh god." She said looking up at Stella. People around the restaurant had taken notice to Lindsay's discomfort.

"What? Lindsay, talk to me?"

"My water broke." She said through clenched teeth.

"It's alright, it's OK. Can someone call an ambulance please?" Stella stood up and shouted around the room. "I'll call Don, and get him to meet us at the hospital with Danny. Everything is going to be alright." She picked up Lindsay's hand as she squeezed it tightly.

"O... K..." She said between gasps of air. Looking up, Stella saw that she was scared.

"You're going to be a Mum!" She said excitedly, as Lindsay smiled scarcely.

* * *

Today was like most days for Danny, lazing on the couch in a pair of warm jogging pants and a sweater watching TV with Don sitting close by in the same position. The Rangers game was on but both sat watching it unexcitedly. It's not that they weren't enjoying it, it's that they were too tired to care.

"You ever find that little girls killer?" Danny asked, breaking the comfortable silence.

"No, only leads are to her brother, but we can't identify him. It's turning into a cold case." Don explained, not taking his eyes off of the television.

"So that's it?" He asked, looking at Don this time.

"We've run into dead ends at every turn. I don't think there is anything else we can do right now." Don was defensive, Danny could see that he had upset him.

"Sorry. I didn't mean-" Don put up his hand to stop him, Danny felt the sensation in his hands tingling.

"Don't worry about it. We're kept the case open, but until we get new leads, I doubt we'll get them." He finished as his phone began to vibrate on his belt. Looking at the message, he stood up grabbing for his coat. "Get up Dan, we gotta go."

"Hum?" He looked up at Don in a haze, standing up he was weak all over and could no longer feel his hands.

"Looks like Lindsay's water broke, we're going to meet them at the hosptial." He pulled his coat over his shoulders and picked up Danny's.

"What are you talkin' a... bout?" He staggered his words.

"You feelin' alright Danny? I said Lindsay is in labour." He took a step towards Danny.

"I dun... waz... kamm..." His words were jumbled, he mouth was barely moving.

"Danny?" Don took his chin in his hand and looked into his eyes. Both of his pupils were the size of a pin. "I'll call an ambulance." He pulled his cell phone off of his belt again. Watching Danny as he dialed, Danny swayed back and forth.

"Nah... sttuh..." He attempted to speak as the whites of his eyes became visible as his eyes rolled back into his head and he collapsed to the ground.

"Danny! Danny, open your eyes!" Don said shaking his body as it hit the floor. "Come on man! Open your eyes!" Taking his pulse he saw how weak it was. "Oh Fuck!" He screamed as he began dialling his 9-1-1 as fast as he could.

* * *

Lindsay and Stella had arrived at the hospital in no time at all, her labour pains weren't as close together as they had thought so she was moved up to the O.B. ward quickly. With nurses and doctors floating around the room, Lindsay was in a daze wondering when Danny would walk through the door. Stella sat at her side holding her, now crippled hand, as she waited.

"I thought you said you called him?" Lindsay said in a panic.

"He's on the way, Lindsay. He'll be here." She tried her best to keep her calm.

"Oh god, I can't do this!" She said as another contraction hit her.

"Yes you can, just remember how to breath through it. You're doing great." Stella coached her.

"No, I don't remember how to breath I never had... time for Lamaze classes!" She screamed squeezing her eyes shut. "Danny has been too sick!"

"Alright just quick breaths, breath deep." Stella said as she heard a soft knock at the door, Lindsay relaxed again as the contraction passed. "Linds, I'm going outside for a second. I'll be right back." She said, wiping the hair out of her eyes.

Leaving she saw Mac and Don standing in the hallway. "Hey, where's Danny?" She rolled up her sleeves and watched them look to the ground. "What? What's going on here?" She instantly felt fear.

"He's... he's in surgery." Mac said as Don turned and faced the wall, resting his forehead against the white brick.

"What?" She gasped.

"They have to remove a blood clot in his brain. Because of all of the drugs he has been put on and where the tumor is sitting if they don't remove them both he won't survive the night. It's his best option, they have already thinned his blood but it wasn't enough. It's an emergency case and they went ahead with the surgery." Mac explained as she looked at Don seeing a tear fall from his eye. Stella covered her mouth and rested a hand above her heart.

"What do we tell Lindsay?" She stuttered.

"Stall it. Tell her we're stuck in traffic." Don said, finally finding his voice.

"I can't lie to her. What if something happens? She'll never forgive me!" Stella said stepping closer and lowering her voice.

"What if you tell her and something happens to her or the baby? Danny would never forgive himself." Don defended his point.

"Danny wouldn't or you wouldn't?" Stella snapped back.

"Hey, hold on a second. Stop it!" Mac interjected standing between them.

"She has been beside Danny throughout this whole ordeal, she deserves to know what's going on with him." Stella made her point one more time.

"I understand that, I do. I think you're right, we should tell her." Don moved to say something but Mac put up his hand to stop him. "But not yet. We stall for now, and we tell her when the time is right."

"But Mac!" Stella said.

"We have to think about Lindsay and the baby right now Stella. You know as well as I do that we can't risk them." He explained.

Stella looked at him and at Don rubbing his face and finally agreed. Giving a nod of agreeance, she turned and entered Lindsay's room again, readying herself to lie.


	10. Chapter 10

She felt nauseous walking through the door to Lindsay's hospital room, from the looks of it her contraction had passed for the time being and she was laying on her back breathing deep holding the hand rail in place of Stella's hand.

"Where'd you go?" Lindsay asked, looking up at her friend.

"Mac's here. He spoke to Don, they're on the way." She said plainly, pushing some free strand of hair from her face.

"Weren't they at home? What's the hold up?" She looked concerned, Stella turned away from her and filled a cup of water and handed it to Lindsay.

"There... there was a car accident on fifth avenue, it's held up traffic from thirty fourth to Central park. Don't worry, they'll be here." She was shocked at how fast she could lie.

"God, I hope he gets here in time. I would hate for him to wait for his daughter to be born and miss the whole thing because of traffic." She put a hand on her belly as another contraction started. "Oh god!"

"It's alright, remember to breath. Shh... shh... there you go!" Stella coached, holding her hand as Lindsay cried in pain. "He'll be here." She hoped she was right.

* * *

Pacing back and forth was beginning to be painful as Don waited outside the surgical ward waiting for word on his best friend. When the pacing no longer helped, he leaned backwards against the wall in the hallway waiting for anyone to tell him everything would be alright. Taping his foot impatiently against the ground he watched as Mac walked slowly up the hall and stood next to him, mimicing his stance.

"Any word?" His voice was low, as if they were at a funeral.

"Nah, nothing yet. I talked to a nurse, she said she'd get an update for us." Staring ahead as he answered half hearted.

"You weren't buggin' her were you?" Mac smiled.

"She rolled her eyes, if that helps any?" Don looked up with a smile.

"He'll be alright, Don." He said in a hopeful tone.

"What if he's not?" He shook his head and wiped his eyes.

"Don't think like that. I don't think any of us can afford the negativity."

"It's not like that. It's logical." He moved back to his familiar form of pacing. "After he got sick I did some digging and found out that one of every five patients that undergo this surgery survive. Twenty percent, Mac!"

"We all know the risks, but-" He attempted.

"It's not a risk, he either survives or he doesn't." Don threw his hands up in the air. "I'm not ready to be the Godfather for a dying man." Tears fell from his eyes.

"What are you talking about?" Mac stood straight from his last statement.

"I'm the Godfather to Lindsay and Danny's baby. When you say yes to something like that, it never usually applies!" Shaking his head he dropped his chin to his chest and stopped pacing.

"They asked you because they want you in their daughter's life, and Danny trusts you to do the right thing if anything were to ever happen. You have to trust that he is going to over come this." Mac put a hand on his shoulder. Looking up from his tears he gave a weak nod.

"You're right. I'm sorry." He shook off his tears and cleared his throat. "Now, where did that nurse go?" Mac smiled as Don pretended everything was fine, once again.

* * *

After yet another contraction, a Doctor came into Lindsay's room, she was covered in sweat and looked utterly exhausted.

"Oh god, tell me you brought drugs with you!" She said sitting forward in bed.

"Hello, Lindsay. How are you feeling?" She asked with a smile. The doctor was young, mid thirties with blond hair that was pulled back in a tight bun.

"Fucking great! I'm great! Can I please have drugs?" She said sarcastically. The doctor laughed, pulling a stool up to her bed.

"I just need to check your cervix first." She pulled gloves on. "I'm Dr. Cannon, Lindsay the nurses tell me we're waiting on the father?" She questioned.

"Yeah... traffic." She made a face as Dr. Cannon pulled up her gown and checked her.

"Eight centimeters, we're moving quickly. I don't think we can do an epidural but we can give you something for the pain." She stood up taking off the gloves.

"What? What do you mean? What is she talking about Stella?" She grabbed Stella, pulling her towards her with strength she didn't know she had.

"Most woman would be happy with how fast your labour is moving along. With only two centimeters left, we don't have time for an epidural." She explained marking her chart.

"I have been sitting here for two, TWO fucking hours and no one has given me as much as an aspirin! Now you tell me I'm too close! Are you kidding me?" She yelled. The grip she had on Stella's arm was enough to break the skin, if there wasn't a shirt blocking her nails. Stella grimaced at the pain.

"You're not the only one having a baby tonight, Lindsay. I'm sorry. I'll be back shortly, and the nurse will take care of you." She turned and left the room.

"Yeah thanks for nothing!" She screamed after her as she disappeared through the door. "That bitch!" She spit out, stepping painfully out of the bed.

"Lindsay, what are you doing? Get back in bed." Stella said, nursing her arm where Lindsay had clutched.

"She doesn't want to help me, I'll go somewhere that they will." She picked up her coat and began to put it on.

"What are you going to do? Go to another hospital when your contractions are minutes apart!" She tried to pull her back into bed.

"I'm fine, just help me." She said as another contraction hit her. "Oh god!" She cried, folding with pain.

"This is silly, come here." Stella helped her painfully step over to her bed.

"I can't do this without him! I'm not ready to be a single mother! Where is Danny?" She cried, tears falling freely down her house.

"Lindsay..." She trailed off helping her breath as the contraction pulled apart her stomach.

"Where is he really Stella? And this time don't lie to me, I will literally kill you!" She closed her eyes and breathed contraction passed and the room fell silent.

"He's here." She said plainly.

"But?" She looked at her, the brown eyes that would normally be light in colour were dark from the pain and tears.

"Don got the call as a blood clot blew in his head, Dr. Reese decided he couldn't wait any longer for surgery." She felt tears stinging her eyes.

"Traffic was the best excuse you could come up with?" She looked disappointed.

"Don's idea." Stella smiled.

"Makes sense." Her voice broke.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry Lindsay." Moving next to her in bed she put her arm around her shoulder.

"Can you do me a favour?" Lindsay asked, looking up at Stella as tears fell from her eyes.

"Anything?"

"Can you go and find out how the surgery is going?" She asked, feeling her body shake.

"Are you sure you want to be alone right now?" Stella asked, wiping the tears from Lindsay's eyes with her thumb.

"I can't do this without knowing how its going. Please Stella, please find out if he is alright?" Her voice broke.

"Alright. I'll go. I'll be back as soon as I can." She said squeezing her shoulders.

"Thanks, Stella." She said forcing out a small smile.

* * *

Making her way to the surgical ward she found herself dragging her feet, for fear of bad news. Entering the waiting room, Don looked up to Stella and both gave a nod of understanding as she walked to Mac whom was standing over the nursing station talking to a nurse with large red curly hair. Feeling Stella beside him he turned and gave her a hug.

"How's he doing?" She asked, hoping he has an answer.

"All we know is that they removed the blood clot and now they are working on the tumor. She figured the tissue removal could be up to four or five hours, depending on what area is effected. How's Lindsay?" He asked, still holding her shoulder in his large hand.

"She knows." She said looking at her feet taking in the information about Danny's condition.

"I kind of figured she'd put the pieces together." He admitted as Stella moved to the hard plastic chairs to sit down.

"How did we get here? How did everything get so confusing?" She asked to no one in particular.

"I don't know." Mac said looking off into space.

"I'm going to check on Lindsay." Don said putting his hand on Stella shoulder from behind her.

"No, no, I just need a moment. I'll go-" Don put his hand up to stop her.

"Hey, she's my Goddaughter. I'll go." He said with a smile as he turned and walked down the hallway back to Lindsay's hospital room.

Stella sat in silence for a moment, before turning back to her friend who sat quietly beside her staring off into the air. "Mac?" She said getting his attention.

"Hum?" He looked at her, seeing the tears were hanging to the lids of her eyes.

"He'll be alright won't he?" She asked knowing he couldn't truly answer, she just needed someone to say that everything would be alright. Taking her hand in his, he smiled, unable to lie. Even he didn't know how this would end. Stella smiled back as Sheldon, Adam, and Sid entered the waiting room.

"We got here as soon as we wrapped the case. How are they?" Sheldon explained as they gathered around them.

"Lindsay is eight centimeters dilated and Danny has a while yet to go." Stella explained.

"So what do we do now?" Adam asked, looking around for someone to tell him how to react.

"Now, we wait." Mac said, leaning back in the uncomfortable hospital chair.

"We wait." Sid said sitting down across from them, as the rest of the team followed suit.

* * *

Lindsay lay on her side as another contraction ripped through her abdomen, holding her belly as a nurse she did not know held her hand. Tears fell from her eyes as she cried out in agony.

"Tough girl." Don said coming into the room.

"I hate you." Lindsay said as she nearly grinding her teeth in pain. Moving beside the bed, Don massaged her lower back.

"Is that better?" He asked, pushing his fingers into the small of her back helping her through the pain.

"No... but it helps." She admitted as she rolled over onto back as the nurse checked on her. "I can't do this!" She cried.

"Yes you can." Don sat down next to her and held her hand.

"We're close Lindsay, another centimeter and you can start pushing." The nurse at the end of the bed announced. "I'm going to get Dr. Cannon." She said, taking off her gloves off and leaving the room.

"No, can't I wait for Danny? Please, I can't do this alone!" She cried, the tears were stinging her skin. Don reached over her and took a cloth and wiped her face.

"You're not alone. I'm here, and the entire team is here. When Danny wakes up, he'll have a beautiful daughter to look at. I'll help you through this, I'm not going anywhere. I promise." He said, holding her face in his hands. "He'd be so proud of you, Linds."

"How is he?" She asked, as she gulped down tears.

"Only good news so far. They removed the blood clot and now they are working on removing the piece of hell from his head." He rinsed the cloth and wiped her face again.

"That's good right?" She breathed deep.

"It's good." He said softly, taking her hand as another contraction came over her.

"Ah, god! Don she's coming! I can't wait!" She cried nearly breaking his hand.

"Let me get a doctor! Lindsay breath! Wait for the doctor!" He jumped from the bed and moved to the door as Lindsay cried out in pain. "I need some help in here!" He screamed as nurses and doctors flooded the room.

"Don!" Lindsay called as he moved back to her side.

"I'm here." He held her hand as her labour took course.


	11. Chapter 11

It started in his toes, then the pads of his feet then up to his ankle, and calf. The prickling sensation pulled up his thigh as he felt the air move in his lungs, dragging him back to a state of consciousness. The itch of pain radiated from his ears and moved down the back of his neck. Breathing deep seemed to take a full body reaction to pull the air into his lungs, struggling awake was seeming more and more like he was swimming to the top of the ocean from the farthest deps to the black cold waters beneath. He could feel his fingers but they felt foreign, as if he was borrowing them from a friend. The twitching came there after, shifting his muscles as his eyes seemed unresponsive to him. Hearing his own voice as a low grumbling sound in his throat, he felt the urge to yell, though the sound might kill him if he did.

There were voices near, but the were a mix of sound and wind nothing making sense. He tried again to speak but felt nothing but a burning sensation in his throat, coughing down the sound.

"Danny, squeeze my hand if you can hear me?" He heard, but the sound was muffled by beeps and buzzing sounds as light made its way into the smallest crack of his eyes. The tingling in his fingers ached as he did his best to control his muscles, pulling them tight around the flesh that sat around them.

"Good job, Danny it's Don, everything is going to be alright man." He said in a soft tone and spoke slowly.

"Mmph." Danny managed to get out as the light burned his eyes, squeezing them shut before they opened completely.

"Hey, kill the light in here." He heard Don order, as shuffling feet went around the room and the light disappeared. "Open your eyes man." He was back close again, close so Danny knew he was there.

"Dnn...Don?" He managed to force out a word, though his voice was something he could barely recognize, after months of pain this was the worst he had felt.

"Danny, it's Dr. Reese. I'm going to give you something for the pain." Her voice was low, as if she knew his head was about to split open.

"O... K..." Danny said rolling his head to the side, slowly opening his eyes he found the room to be surrounded by people. "Linds?" He called out in a raspy tone.

"She's not here, Danny." Don held his hand tight.

"Wh-" He attempted to say but pain took over his vision again.

"She's resting. Everything is going to be fine, just relax." Letting go of his hand he heard whispering. "Dr. Reese, can I talk to you outside."

"Of course." She said as they moved around, as Danny lay with his eyes closed.

"I'll be right back, bud." He said patting his gently on the chest as they moved out of the room.

Danny stayed awake for only a couple seconds before the drugs took over and he fell back into a painless, peaceful sleep.

"How did everything go in there?" Don said folding his arms over his chest, looking Dr. Reese directly in the eye.

"From the preliminary tests, everything looks fine. We removed the cancerous tissues and the blood clot, we won't know any long term problems until he is conscious."

"What do you mean, you said it was fine?" He was confused, if everything went well how could there still be problem.

"We had to removed some portions of his brain to be sure that they were not effected, therefore we might find that he does have some problems. They will most likely be minor they don't effect him at all. He seemed to remember who you are and who Lindsay was, that right there shows that his conscious mind is fine." She explained with a very doctor tone about her. "He's not out the woods yet, but he is doing very well."

"Good. Good... that's good." Don said out loud, smiling.

"If you need anything... whoa!" She said as Don pulled her into a big hug. Squeezing her with a heart filled with happiness she smiled at the gesture.

"Sorry." He said stepping back from the hug.

"No, no... it's fine." She smiled, brushing hair back from her face. "As I was saying, if you need anything you can have me paged." She smiled before walking past him, leaving Don smiling hugging his chest. Looking back before she left the I.C.U. hall, she smiled to herself.

* * *

She wasn't really sleeping, but she wasn't really awake either. With thoughts of Danny on her mind she couldn't quite sit still, she couldn't close her eyes without seeing herself in a black dress putting a box into the ground. Don hadn't been back since she had given birth, her daughter was seven pounds three ounces and she was beautiful. Blue eyes and the smallest amount of blond hair sticking up from her smooth scalp, Lindsay couldn't help but fall in love with her when she saw her. Crying harder then she had ever cried in her life, she held her as she prayed Danny would too be able to experience that.

Hearing someone enter the room she opened her eyes and shifted herself into a sitting position. Stella walked into the room holding her daughter wrapped in blankets.

"Hey mom. We've had a warm bath and are now in our beautiful yellow jammies, courtesy of Aunt Stella herself." She smiled, putting her sleeping baby into her arms. Lindsay made a small gasping sound as she took her, she was so warm and so small.

"Hi baby." She said, as she moved her little tongue around her mouth and settled into the crook of her mother's arm.

"She's so beautiful, Linds. So beautiful, and she has her Daddy's eyes." She said as she sat down on the bed next to Lindsay, putting her arm on the pillow behind Lindsay's head.

"Speaking of her Daddy?" She looked up at Stella.

"Don said he woke up, only momentarily then fell back asleep. He was looking for you though, that's a good sign." She smiled, tucking the hair behind her ears for her.

"Good, that's good." She looked back down at her child in arm.

"Thought of any names?" She asked, knowing she refused to name her before Danny met her.

"We'll decide together." She rubbed her thumb over her babies forehead, as if convincing herself that she was real.

"I can't believe she's here already." Stella said softly, putting a hand on the baby.

"I think I have been waiting for her my whole life." She smiled as a tear fell from her eye. This time it was a happy tear, a tear for her daughter she just met.

"Hi guys." Mac said softly entering the room being followed by Adam and Sheldon.

"Oh Lindsay, she's beautiful." Adam said touching the babies head softy.

"Thanks, guys." Lindsay looked tired, but mostly she just missed Danny. Looking down at her baby, she saw Danny looking back at her in her big blue eyes as they opened from sleep. "Hello, little girl!" Lindsay said, seeing her little family for the first time. Cooing up at her, her little hand wrapped around Lindsay's finger. "I never thought I could love something this much." She smiled looking up at her other family, all of which had tears in their eyes as Don made his was to the doorway.

"Don? Any news?" Mac said, turning his attention to Don who stood watching the scene from the doorway.

"Yeah, Danny's Doctor is hot." He said with a smile as he stepped carefully to the side of Lindsay's bed. A quiet tone of laughter came over them as he put his hand on Lindsay's calf over the covers. "She said they won't know of any minor long term effects until he wakes up, but the surgery went well." He smiled.

"That's the best news I've heard in months." Lindsay said resting her head back on the pillow in relief.

"Amen to that." Don said.

"Want to hold your Goddaughter?" Lindsay said holding her arms out to him.

"I'd love to." He smiled, taking the small girl into his arms. "Wow." Was all he could say as he pulled her close, careful not to drop her or foul her in any way. "Hi Baby Messer, I'm your Uncle Don. I'll be the nice one that will investigate all your boyfriends and scare off the bad ones." He said softly as her little mouth produced a yawn. Everyone watched on with smiles as Lindsay's head fell back onto the pillow finally able to relax enough to fall asleep.

"Let's go." Mac whispered, as everyone but Don filed out of the room and he moved into a chair beside her bed and rocked the baby to sleep.

* * *


	12. Chapter 12

* * *

Dr. Reese stood at the doorway taking a long breath and watched Lindsay before she entered her hospital room. Lindsay rocked her new born back and forth in her chair, cooing as the baby fell asleep. Sensing her presence Lindsay looked up with a soft smile across her face, as she entered the room stepping slowly next to her.

"How are you feeling?" Dr. Reese said leaning down with a hand on Lindsay's shoulder.

"Surprised." She said smiling up at her.

"Surprised? That's a new one. How so?" She asked, sitting down in the chair across from her.

"I'm a natural, and the world didn't end." She joked.

"You did well. You've held together perfectly." She smiled, looking over at mother and baby. "It's easy to make them love you at this age, wait until they get older and they're embarrassed to hug you!" She said as they both laughed.

"I never thought I could love something this much." She looked back down at her sleeping child.

"Yeah I know what you mean." She said despondently.

"You're a mother?" Lindsay was surprised once again.

"Yeah, brain surgeon and a mother who would have thought?" Dr. Reese laughed softly.

"How old?" She asked.

"Four and half, his name is Jacob." She smiled, pulling a photo out of her pocket.

"I didn't know you were married." Lindsay said taking the photo. "He's beautiful."

"Thank you." She shook her head. "I was married, he was killed two years ago." Her voice caught as she finished.

"Oh, I'm so sorry." Lindsay was stunned by the news.

"It's alright. Sorry, look at me getting all choked up." Dr. Reese, wiped her eyes.

"How was he killed?" Lindsay asked cautiously.

"He was a doctor, he worked in the E.R. and was doing a ride along with the F.D.N.Y. one night. Some junkies robbed the rig and Mark was caught in the crossfire." Wiping the tears from her eyes, she avoided Lindsay eye contact.

"Did they ever catch them?" Lindsay didn't know why she was asking so many questions, but she felt the need to understand.

"Yes, they did. All they stole was a vile of Morphine. Mark would have laughed to know exactly what his life was worth." She chuckled.

"I'm sorry, Dr. Reese. I've only gotten a taste of what life would be like without Danny. I couldn't imagine..." She trailed off.

"It's Rebecca." She said softly.

"Sorry?" She leaned closer to get a better listen.

"It's my name, you can call me Rebecca." She said taking a breath.

"Rebecca? That's a beautiful name." She looked down at her sleeping child. "What do you think? Huh, little Rebecca Messer?" She smiled looking up at Rebecca.

"I think it's a perfect name." She smiled.

"Would you like to hold her?" Lindsay asked, seeing how happy the doctor looked.

"Would you mind?" She stood.

"No, not at all." Lindsay smiled holding out the baby as Dr. Reese took her into her arms. "How is her Daddy doing?" She asked, avoiding the question.

"Danny is resting comfortably." She explained as she took a seat beside Lindsay's chair.

"How long before he wakes up?" She asked nervously, as their baby slept soundly in her arms.

"That's up to him. The surgery took most of his energy, but everything went smoothly." She explained. "As horrible as that blood clot was, it might have saved his life."

"But he's going to be alright?" Lindsay pressed.

"He's passed all brain activity tests, and once he wakes up we have a couple more to do. Most of the tissue from around the tumor that he had to remove was mostly just gross memory."

"Gross memory? I don't understand, that means you did have to remove some of his brain?" She asked nervously.

"Yes, but because it is gross memory he won't know it's missing. It's like bulk storage, a backup if you will, he won't know it's missing because he never knew it was there to begin with." Rebecca explained as Baby Rebecca began to stir. "Looks like someone is looking for her mama." She smiled and handed her back over to her mother.

"All she does is sleep, lucky girl." She said with a yawn.

"Why don't you get some sleep and I'll come back to take you back to Danny's room." Rebecca stood up, and helped Lindsay back into her bed.

"Thank you for everything you've done. You've saved my family." Lindsay said, resting her head on the pillow as Rebacca put baby Rebecca into her bassinet.

"It's my pleasure. Sleep tight." She said, tucking the baby girl in.

* * *

He was awake long before his eyes opened, he could feel every muscle running under his skin. Never in his life did he think he'd be grateful for pain, but at the moment he was happy to be alive. Moving his fingers he felt a hand squeezing them, this time no one was talking to him, willing him to wake. Finally pulling back the curtain to the world he slowly opened his eyes to see Lindsay sitting at the side of his bed, slowly drawing circles on the back of his hand.

"Hi." She said softly with a smile.

"Hi." His voice was low as raspy, the bandages on his head felt tight but he kept his eyes on her.

"Can you tell me your name?" He heard from the other side of the bed, he turned to see Dr. Reese standing beside him.

"Daniel Messer." He asked in a low tone, clearing his throat.

"And what's my name?" She asked.

"Dr. Rebecca Reese." He smiled.

"Good, that's right. And what's her name?" She smiled pointing to Lindsay. Danny rolled his head to the side and looked at her with a serious face.

"I've never seen her before." Lindsay's face fell until she saw Danny flash her a toothy smile.

"Jerk." Lindsay said putting her hand over her chest to relax herself.

"Alright Danny, I have one more test to do and you'll be done for a bit." She moved around his bed. "OK, squeeze my hand?" Danny did so. "Good, ok now press on my hand as if you are pressing on the gas?" She placed her hand on the bottom of his foot as Danny did what was asked. "Good. Very good, motor functions seem to be intact. I'll be back in a couple hours to run a couple more tests, but everything seems to be going well. Looks like you are in remission." She smiled.

"Thank you, I don't even..." Danny trailed off.

"My pleasure." She smiled at Danny and Lindsay before picking up her chart and leaving the room.

"Have any wild dreams?" Lindsay asked, running a hand over his chest.

"Yeah, I had this brain tumor and almost died, but I woke up with an Angel next to me." He smiled.

"Yes you did. I have someone I'd like you to meet." Lindsay said before picking up their daughter from the bassinet.

"She's so small!" Danny said excitedly as she placed her in his arms. "She has my eyes. It's so weird, god I can't believe we did this." His voice was soft and full of love.

"Think of any names while in a coma?" She smiled and lay down with her family.

"It wasn't a coma, I was just doped up, and yeah I did." He looked at her. "Rebecca." He said, looking back to his daughter he continued. "She saved my life we should have her in ours."

"That's exactly what I was thinking." Lindsay kissed him gently, careful not to disturb her bandages.

"We survived." He said closing his eyes.

"Yeah, we did." She said seeing that Danny was crying. "We all did." She placed her pinky finger in between Rebecca's small hand.

"She's perfect." Danny said, wiping a tear from his eye.


	13. Chapter 13

**Four Months Later...**

It felt like the first day of high school, he felt awkward and embarrassed like standing in front of the whole school in nothing but his boxers. People walked around him as if he wasn't even there, his knees shook as he took the familiar steps towards his office, the lab was his second home for as long as he remembered now it felt foreign.

"Danny?" He heard someone calling him, turning towards the voice he saw Adam walking towards him.

"Hey buddy!" He said excitedly as Adam pulled him in for a hug.

"What are you doing here, man?" He asked happily as they separated.

"I'm... I'm back." He explained, resting his hands on his hips trying to hid his discomfort.

"Already?" Adam asked cautiously.

"Dude, it's been four month. What are ya talkin' about _already_?" He laughed.

"Lindsay told me you just finished your radiation treatment a month ago, I just... sorry, I just thought you'd need more time?" Adam was back to being his awkward self. Danny put a hand on his shoulder to relax him.

"I did, I'm alright. I promise." He said flashing him his Messer grin.

"Good, I'm happy it worked out." He smiled as Danny continued down the hallway with Adam at his side. "You talk to the boss man yet?"

"A bit. I'm on light duty for now, but that basically means going over my cases and helping out in the lab." He explained as they walked past Mac's office.

"Danny, come in here please." Mac called as they walked past.

"I'll catch up with you later." Adam said as Danny turned and entered Mac's office.

"Hey Mac, how's it going?" He asked casually.

"I have four open homicide cases, I'm down three lab techs, and a blistering head ache." He said nonchalantly.

"I know the feeling." He said softly, rocking on his heels.

"Oh, sorry Danny." Mac looked up and realized what he had said.

"It's alright. Besides, you're only down two techs now." Danny said smiling.

"You sure you're ready? If it's too soon I understand." Sitting down in his chair, Danny stood staring at him.

"You can only take so much sitting around, Mac. I'm ready, trust me."

"Sitting around? You have a four month old baby, you're probably run off your feet!" He chuckled.

"Yeah, there is always that." He said, finally taking a seat across from his boss, no longer able to sway. Once seated he rubbed his temples.

"You alright?" Mac was nervous.

"Yeah, just not used to the lighting. I'm fine." He lied, since the surgery his vision had struggled with light sensitivity. Dr. Reese had attempted to give him adjustment glasses but he refused to wear them.

"If you have any trouble let me know. Start on your case files and I'll find you later for your assignment." He explained.

"Thanks Mac." He stood up and hid that he was a bit uneasy of his feet, though Mac was too busy to notice.

"Welcome back, Dan." He said looking up at Danny as he left the office.

* * *

Settling himself in the familiar surroundings of his office he felt himself relax almost instantly. Taking a deep breath he closed his eyes and rested his head against the back of his chair.

"Home, sweet home." He said softly.

"Don't let Lindsay hear you say that." Don said coming into the room and taking a seat across from him.

"If you don't tell on me, I'll be fine." He smiled.

"I thought I was hearing things, you back already?"

"Yeah, I'm on light duty." He explained, Don noticed the circles under his eyes.

"Miss it?" He asked.

"I don't know if I miss it or I just need something to think about other then diapers and formula." He smiled.

"Well I miss working with you. How is my Goddaughter?" He relaxed more into his seat.

"She does have a name you know, you can't call her _Goddaughter_ her whole life." He rested his head against his fist on the arm of the chair.

"Yeah but it sounds cooler." He smiled. "Fine, how's Rebecca doing?"

"She's perfect." He said closing his eyes again.

"You still in pain?" Don asked, since he got sick his alerts went off faster then normal.

"Just not used to the hustle yet, I'll be fine." He said through closed eyes.

"What hustle? You've been here for twenty minutes? If you came back too soon say the word and I'll drag your ass home." Don leaned forward, pressing the fact that he was concerned. Opening his eyes, Danny saw the look on Don's face.

"I'm good. Really." He smiled. "When all you've done is sleep for four months and take care of a baby, running around New York and coming back to a stressful job is a big change." He realized something he hadn't before, what if he couldn't handle it after all the time off?

"Well, that's why Mac is keeping you on light duty. Take it easy, you hear me?" Don said standing up.

"Yeah. Thanks, Don."

"For what?" He asked with a confused look on his face.

"For checking on me for Lindsay." He smiled.

"I'm a bad liar, huh?" He said with a laugh.

"No, I just know you too well. You can tell her I'm fine." He began pulling file folders out of a box beside his desk.

"Yeah, yeah. See ya later, Danno." He turned and began to leave. "Oh, by the way, I'll like the buzz cut." He winked and left the room.

Smiling as he watched his friend leave his office, Danny took a moment and ran his hand over his skull. Feeling the soft skin of his scar that ran across the top of his head and the little hair that had grown back since his last treatment, he felt weak again. Unsure of himself and his life, something that had crossed his mind on more then one occasion in the last couple of months. Since the surgery, his hair had changed colour, what was once sandy blond had turned to a dark brown. He was no longer the Danny Messer he knew, he had changed. Unable to tell whether it was fatherhood who had made him a little softer, or that he nearly died, he was a new man. Being unsure of himself was a new feeling for him and for the first time in his life, that was something he was not used to.


	14. Chapter 14

Never in her life had Lindsay liked being off work this much. Spending her time between her beautiful daughter and Danny, she had never been so happy in her life. The mid afternoon light was criscrossing the floor in hers and Danny's apartment as she sat quietly on the couch with Rebecca asleep across her chest. Taking in the silence she looked at the wall next to the window, covered in photos of family and friends. Catching her attention was a photo of Danny from a year ago; his smile was wide and his eyes bright. The black and white photo stood out against the other, his hair was blond and shined in the sunlight, his face was fuller, his eyes had a sparkle about them and his smile seemed genuine, he seemed happy.

Snapping out of her daze by the vibration of her cell phone on the table beside her, she grabbed it before she missed it.

"Hello?" She said in quick voice.

"Hey Linds." It was Danny, he sounded down.

"Hey, babe. You alright?" She talked softly so she wouldn't wake Rebecca.

"Yeah, I'm... I'm missing you, actually." He said, she could tell he was feeling down. "I just wanted to hear the sound of your voice. How's the baby?" He cleared his throat.

"I miss you too. She's asleep in my arms." Looking down at her baby, she smiled.

"Good. That's... good." He was quiet, something seemed off.

"What's wrong?" Looking up at the photo of him, she imagined the frown on his face now.

"Nothing... I'm just not used to being here. Don't worry; no nosebleeds, no seizures, I'm fine. I promise." He cleared his throat again to mask the sadness in his voice.

"I'm not worried. Besides if anything happens again, I'll know before you do." She laughed a little and continued. "How are you eyes? Any headaches?"

"Lindsay..." He said with an audible sigh.

"Danny?" She said in an authoritative tone.

"Yes, the light is bugging me. Yes, I have a slight headache, but I'm fine. I've had worse." He rolled his eyes, resting his forehead against his hand as he looked at his desk.

"If it gets to be too much-" She began before Danny cut her off.

"I know, I'll take a break." He smiled, he had to admit he loved when she worried about him.

"Good. Actually, it's funny you called, I was just thinking about you." Readjusting herself on the couch so she was sitting up straighter.

"Oh yeah, which part of me?" He joked, Lindsay could hear the excitement in his voice.

"Ha ha, very funny Messer. I was thinking I'd come down there to see you, and the team." She said as Rebecca's little eyes opened. "Have a good nap, Angel?" She cooed softly to her child.

"I'd like that. Is Becca awake?"

"Yes, she's opening her beautiful blue eyes right now." She smiled as she let out a small yawn. "I'll drop her off at your Mom's. Besides, we don't get a lot of quiet time together any more." She explained standing up from the couch and resting Rebecca in her chair.

"Sounds good to me, Mac has me milling through old cases anyways. I'll be needing a break soon."

"Good, then I'll see you in a couple hours." She said as they bid their goodbyes and hung up. Taking Rebecca's bottle from the fridge she placed it in the microwave as she pulled her hair back and placed it in a pony tail on the top of her head.

"Hey little girl." She said softly, kissing her daughter's nose. "I think we're going to be alright." She smiled as Rebecca bounced her arms up and down.

* * *

Without realizing it, Danny had fallen asleep on top of his paper work. With his arms folded in front of him and his forehead resting comfortably on his wrists, he couldn't believe how comfortable it was before he slept. His dreams were vivid as he slept, thoughts of bodies and tumors clouded his mind as a hand rested on his shoulder, startling him awake.

"Whoa, sorry Danny!" Stella said with a smile.

"Stella? Oh, man... I must have dozed off. What time is it?" He said scratching his wrist, trying to wake up faster.

"Don't worry about it. How are the case files coming?" She said leaning on the desk beside him.

"Good question. Ah, about half way through looks like." He said shuffling papers around.

"Good. You feel like helping me out with some trace?" She asked, hoping he'd say yes.

"That's up to Mac, actually."

"Since when do you play nicely by the rules?" She laughed, and Danny gave a chuckle.

"I think they took the rebel out during surgery." He smiled, folding his hands over his chest.

"Well if you change your mind, that's where I'll be." She said standing straight and leaving the room.

"Hey, aren't you going to ask me if I'm alright twenty times?" He said with a smile.

"No." She smiled, "I think you're heard it enough, you're doing good Danny." She said before leaving the office.

Watching Stella as she left, he smiled. She was right, considering everything, he was doing great. He had a beautiful daughter, a woman who loved him, and a body that worked. Looking back at the work before him, he changed his mind. Moving from his chair he stood up, and reached for his lab coat on the hook on the wall, only to be caught by a wave of dizziness.

"Whoa." He said softly, holding the wall with his eyes closed to stable himself.

"Hey babe." He heard from behind him. Turning back to the door he saw Lindsay smiling at him.

"Hi..." He turned, still holding the wall. "You're early?"

"Your mom met me downtown, apparently she wants to take Becca to show off to her friends." She smiled, walking closer and giving him a light kiss.

"Yeah, she does that." He was still dizzy.

"Everything alright?" She was beginning to notice he seemed off.

"Yeah I think I just got up too fast."

"Here sit down." She pulled his chair closer.

"No, I'm good. You hungry?" He said, shaking his head.

"Starving!" She smiled, resting her hand on his upper arm. "You sure that's all it is?" She was scared.

"Let's go eat." He smiled, following her from the office. Putting his lab coat back on the hook, he picked up his jacket and pulled it over his shoulders. "That's weird." He said rubbing his arms.

"What?" Lindsay asked nonchalantly.

"My arm..."

"What's wrong with it?" Her alarms went off.

"It's numb. I can't feel my.... arm... mum....nah..." His words slurred into one. Lindsay watched in horror as his eyes slid backwards into his head and his body collapsed to the floor.

"Danny!" She screamed running to his side and falling to her knees. "Someone help me!" She screamed as tears came to her eyes. Shaking him he wasn't waking up, his eyes remained open staring straight ahead with no reaction to the world. "No, Danny don't do this to me! Wake up!" She screamed. "Someone HELP ME!" She screamed as loud as she could as Sheldon heard and entered the office.

"Lindsay? What happened?" He said running to her side.

"He collapsed, he won't wake up!" She said as tears ran down her cheek.

"Call an ambulance." Sheldon said grabbing her hand. "Lindsay, look at me. Get help, now!"

"OK." Lindsay said jumping to her feet and grabbing the phone and called for help.

"Danny, can you hear me?" He said feeling for a pulse. "Danny look at me buddy." He repeated, as he rested his ear down to listen for a heart beat. When he didn't feel one right away he began CPR.

Mac entered the room after hearing the chaos from down the hall, his sights falling on Danny and Sheldon, who was now breathing for his friend.

"Hawkes? What happened?" He said in a tone that didn't cover his fear.

"I think he has another blood clot, he isn't breathing." Sheldon said as he pounded on his friends chest.

"Oh god." Mac said as he began to help with the CPR. "Breath for him." He said as he took over chest compressions.

"Danny, no!" Lindsay said watching the sight before her. "Please wake up. Please!"

"Come on Danny, don't do this!" Mac said, as the worked doing what they could to save his life.

"Danny?" Lindsay said as tears fell. "Danny? Danny are you with me?" She said a lot softer this time. "Earth to Danny?" Lindsay said with a laugh. "Hey? You in there?" He heard as she smacked his shoulder.

"What?" Danny said snapping out of it. Realizing his dream got the best of him.

"Where'd you go?" Lindsay said with a smile.

"Sorry, day dreaming I guess." He said as he finished putting his coat on his shoulders.

"Alright, where'd you wanna go for lunch?"

"Actually, I wouldn't mind making a stop."

"Hum?" Picking up her purse she turned back to Danny who pulled her tight for a hug. "Whoa, what's gotten into you?" She laughed, and hugged back.

"Sorry, I'm just scared to loose you all of a sudden." He whispered, closing his eyes and burying his face in her shoulder.

"Danny, what's wrong?" Letting go he looked at her, Lindsay realized that he was crying. Taking his face in his hands, she wiped his tears with her thumbs.

"I'm sorry, I'm not myself." He shook his head looking down.

"I know, you haven't been yourself for awhile." She said softly as Danny looked at her again.

"I want to go back to that person, I don't know how to get there." He admitted, unable to look her in the eye any longer.

"It'll take some time." She put her hands on his arms, before continuing. "You've been through hell, and you survived. Let's just look forward to tomorrow, one day at a time."

"I love you, you know that right? I don't want you to ever have to go through that again. I'm going to take better care of myself and our family, I promise I'll make everyday count." He smiled, and kissed her. A kiss which surprised her at first, but then reacted to by accepting completely. Letting herself get lost in the kiss as her toes tingled, and his hands twisted in her hair.

"Wow." She finally said nearly forgetting how to speak. Standing in his grasp, she breathed onto his face letting the moment last. "That was definitely a Danny Messer Pre-Cancer kiss." She smiled closing her eyes and feeling the moment.

Danny rested his forehead against hers breathing in her scent. "Thanks, I've been hiding that one in my back pocket for the right time." He smiled before kissing her again.


	15. Chapter 15

He couldn't stop his knee from jumping up and down as he and Lindsay waited patiently in Dr. Reese's office.

"Danny would you stop that? You're driving me nuts." Lindsay said, putting her hand on his restless knee.

"Sorry, I'm anxious." He said not looking at her.

"Can you explain to me why we had to make an emergency stop for a CT scan during our lunch break?" She questioned, noticing that Danny wasn't looking at her, and hadn't since the scan. "Danny?" She said, trying to move into his line of sight, but saw him look away once again.

"Just being cautious." He said, as his knee began jumping again. "Why is this taking so long? I told Mac I'd be back by three." He checked his watch again for the third time.

"Is there a reason why you won't look at me or are you going to continue to act like nothing is going on here?" She said angrily.

"Nothing is going on here." He rolled his eyes and shook his head.

"Danny, be realistic." Leaning forward towards him, she put her hand on his chin and made him look at her.

"I have a bad feeling and I want to take care of it before it turns into something." He was acting childish, after everything that had happened he still couldn't admit something was wrong.

"When?" Her voice was plain, and impatient.

"Well that's why we're here." He looked away once again.

"No I mean, when did you start to have these feelings?" She said letting out a sigh.

"Since I woke up this morning. I was going to wait until our appointment on Monday, I just didn't want to risk it in case..." He trailed off, shaking his head.

"In case, what?"

"In case I have another clot and you wouldn't be able to wake me up tomorrow morning. I don't want to do that to you and Rebecca. Never again." Looking her in the eyes, she saw how serious he was and how much it hurt him to even think about.

"Again? Where was I when this happened before?" Lindsay asked, confused as to what he meant.

"You know what I mean." He sulked like a kid, folding his arms over his chest and looking away.

"I'm happy that you are being careful, I am, but you should have told me what was going on." Squeezing his knee, he looked at her again.

"You're right. I'm sorry." He said, holding her hair protectively in his.

"Danny, Lindsay, good to see you both." Dr. Reese said entering the office and sitting down across from them holding a large envelope.

"Nice to see you too." Lindsay said sweetly with a smile.

"So Danny, how are you feeling?" She asked, looking him in the eye.

"I... well that's why I am here. I've had a strange feeling all morning and I didn't want to take any chances so I spoke with Dr. Vang and he set me up with a CT scan. I've had some weakness on the right side, dizziness; all of the symptoms, so I-" He rambled, before Dr. Reese interrupted.

"Hold on a second!" Dr. Reese said putting up her hands to stop him.

"What?" He asked, looking confused.

"That much I know, I spoke with Dr. Vang and he said he set you up with a CT scan. He said you're worried about another aneurysm?" She asked, pulling the x-ray out of the envelope. Standing up she walked to the light board behind her desk.

"Yeah, I just thought that..." He said looking at his chest. Fear crept up his spine that his suspicions were real.

"You were right to come in. Looks like the formation of an aneurysm." She said pointing to the X-ray.

"Wait, what does that mean?" Lindsay said standing up, shock hitting her.

"It means Danny has a good intuition. Let's get you set up with some blood thinners, and we'll do an angiogram. Looks like we'll have to do an embolisation and get rid of the aneurysm before it ruptures." Dr. Reese said walking around the front of the desk. Danny sat staring straight ahead, unable to move from fear. Taking notice, Dr. Reese stopped and sat on the desk in front of him. "It's going to be alright. You came in time. It's a known complication we the surgery, it could have happened today or two years from now, but we caught it. Most people wouldn't have given it second thought until it's too late."

"So, what are the options here?" Danny asked, finding his voice.

"Our best shot right now is an embolisation. We'll introduce a catheter into your upper thigh and feed it through your system, the solution we'll give you should paralyze the cells, stopping them from spreading. Then we will go in and take what's left of the clot out. You'll under anesthetic during this time. It's a two part procedure, we'll start the first part after your first series of exams." She explained in her soft voice, Danny trusted her.

"And if it doesn't work?" His voice stuck on the last word.

"It will." Lindsay said taking his hand in hers, feeling that he was shaking.

"There are some risks, but nothing we haven't dealt with before. We caught this early, the chances are nearly diminished."

"I thought this was done. I thought I was past it." He shook his head in disbelief.

"Danny-" Lindsay attempted, but Dr. Reese put up her hand to stop her.

"I know this is hard, but I will get you through it, just like last time. I promise." Danny looked up at her and looked into her eyes. He could see that she too, was scared, even if she wouldn't admit it.

"OK. What's next?" He asked confidently.

"First things first, let's get you started on the Heparin and then we'll get you in for an angiogram." She explained standing up. "You ready?" She asked as Danny and Lindsay stood up with her.

"As I'll ever be." He answered glumly. As they walked out of the room.

* * *

An hour later, Danny was sitting in a hospital gown waiting for Dr. Reese to come back; the ward was surprisingly quiet. Being in post-op felt strange, looking around at the other sick patients he had a feeling in his gut that he wasn't supposed to be there. Lindsay sat next to him quietly flipping through a magazine, but Danny knew she wasn't even seeing the pages, she was lost in thought.

"You remember that time we worked the double homicide cases in midtown? We had been on for forty two hours straight, when we finally got home we both fell asleep on the couch in a mess because we didn't have any energy to make it to bed." He asked out of nowhere.

"Yeah, the mother and daughter. What about it?" She asked with a confused look on her face.

"That morning when I woke up, I knew." He folded his hands behind his neck and leaned back against the bed.

"Knew what?" She asked, standing up and sitting on the edge of his hospital bed.

"That I was in love with you." He smiled.

"Danny..." Lindsay said looking down at her lap.

"I want to spent the rest of my life with you, Lindsay. I love you, I love our daughter, I love this life. I know I asked before, but will you?" He didn't finish the question, she knew what he was saying.

"Are you asking me because you think you are going to die? Or because you mean it?" She looked hurt, pained, and he finally knew why.

"Both." He smiled, shifting closer to her.

"You aren't going to die." She picked up his hand.

"I don't know about that, I've never been partial to immortality." He smiled, kissing her forehead. "If there is one thing this experience has taught me, is that we might not always have tomorrow, and you're right, I may not die today but one day. When that day comes I want to make sure that I made the right choices, and that I chose the right girl." Looking up Danny saw that Lindsay was crying.

"Then yes. I will marry you." She smiled weakly, pulling his chin to hers in a soft kiss.

"We should do it before the surgery." Danny said smiling.

"Get married? In the hospital? Without our daughter? Or friends?" Lindsay shook her head.

"OK, OK... point taken."

"I don't want a big wedding, I just want our family there." She pressed her forehead to his, finding it hard not to smile.

"I don't care who is there, other then Becca, as long as I get you." He kissed her again.

"You'll always have me." Lindsay put her hand on his cheek, kissing him again.

The moment was short lived as the sounds of heals clicking came from the door of the room. Looking up Danny saw Don standing in the doorway with a strange look on his face.

"Danno, what's going on?" He said nervously, walking up next to the bed. Lindsay wiped the tears from her eyes before turning around to face her friend.

"Hey Don." She said clearing her throat.

"You alright, what's going on?" He said looking at the I.V. in Danny's arm. "Not again?" He said sadly.

"It's not a tumor, it's alright. It's just a small routine procedure." Danny said confidently.

"Mac called and said that you were at the hospital, I thought my heart was going to stop." He let out a large breath and put his hand over his heart.

"I'll be alright. Dr. Reese says it's routine, shouldn't have a problem." Danny smiled, trying to encourage his friend who was clearly terrified.

"Where's Becca?" Don asked looking at Lindsay.

"With Danny's Mom, she'll be alright. After the surgery I am going to pick her up and take her home, and then come back tomorrow." Lindsay said, brushing Danny's hair.

"I'm only going to be here for a day or two and then I'll be good to go." He said positively hoping he was right.

"I don't understand. You're finished the treatment. What aren't you telling me?" Don was clearly angry.

"Flack, it's fine." He said shifting in bed. Luckily, he wasn't forced into the complete hospital gown yet and had managed to get some scrub pants from Dr. Reese, being half nude would have made this conversation way too difficult.

"No it's not fine, man. You're having surgery again!" He said, his voice getting louder. Standing up Danny went to his friend.

"I'm on blood thinners, I have a small clot forming but we got to it in time. I didn't want to take any chance so I came and got it checked out before something worse happened. I promise, it's going to be alright." He said putting his hands on his friend's shoulder.

"A blood clot? Oh god, Danny." Don shook his head and looked down at his feet.

"It's not like last time." He pleaded. "Don, look at me?" He asked, seeing Don look up at his best friend. "It's routine, they'll get rid of the aneurysm, and I will be fine." Taking a second to let it sink in, Danny saw the visible change in his friend demeanor.

"OK." He said calmly. Lindsay turned away, hiding the tears that fell from her eyes.

"OK." Danny smiled dropping his hands to his side and moving back to his seated position. The silence in the room was comfortable as the three friends sat with their thoughts. No one said another word until Dr. Reese came into the room in her scrubs, dressed for surgery.

"How are you feeling Danny?" She asked, standing from the end of the bed.

"Just a little nauseous." He said resting his hand across his belly.

"That's normal. I have the results from your angiogram. Looks like a cluster of cells."

"What does that mean? Are you still doing an embolization?" Danny asked, feeling his hands begin to shake.

"Yes, it is the best solution. We'll start the first part of the surgery in a couple hours, when was the last time you ate?" Pulling up a stool she sat down.

"Um... breakfast about eight a.m." He explained.

"Alright, we should be fine to start the surgery by four then. Any other symptoms you may have forgotten to tell me this morning?" Looking up from her chart.

"Like what?"

"Blurred vision? Weakness? Difficulty speaking? Anything like that?" She asked, seeing Lindsay flinch and take his hand.

"Blurred vision, I guess... why?" He asked, sensing something else.

"It looked like it may be bleeding." She said plainly.

"What are you talking about? You said it was a small cluster?" Danny's voice shook.

"It is, but it's already began the rupture. We have to introduce the catheter sooner then we expected." Dr. Reese saw his face fall.

"So the risks just got a little more interesting I see." Don said, from his chair beside the bed.

"Yes, but like I said we cau-"

"Yeah we caught it in time, I got that." Danny said angrily.

"I'm sorry this is so difficult but we'll get through it. I'm going to set up an O.R., I'll have someone come and get you." She stood and left the room.

"Well that's that." Danny said more to himself then anyone else.

"I'm going to call your Mother, fill her in. I'll be back." Lindsay said standing.

"Linds, don't let her come down here unless... you know." He reached out to her arm, stopping her from going.

"I know." She smiled, before leaving the room.

Danny and Don sat quietly with their thoughts for what felt like forever, before Don broke the silence.

"Dr. Reese looks good in those scrubs." He said, not looking at Danny but staring straight ahead. Danny looked at him and laughed.

"Why don't you just ask her out dude?" Danny asked, as Don looked up at him.

"Wouldn't it be weird?"

"Why would it be weird? We named our child after her." He explained.

"I don't know, like best friend's girl-best friend's neurosurgeon kinda thing." He said as Danny let out a loud laugh.

"You're insane you know that right?"

"I'll make you a deal. You come out of this surgery A-OK, I'll ask her out." He smiled.

"Deal." He smiled.

"You alright, Danny?" Don said, standing up and getting closer.

"What?"

"You're face?" Don said, getting closer.

"What about it?" He was confused.

"I'll be right back." Don said rushing from the room.

"Don, what the hell?" He said moving to stand up, catching a glimpse of himself in a window. "Oh god." He said softly, noticing the right side of his face was hanging loosely. The muscles no longer holding tight, no wonder he scared Don, he was having a stroke and didn't even realize it. His hand went numb, shaking it he rested against the side of the bed. From behind him he heard Dr. Reese rush into the room.

"Danny?" She asked. Moving his mouth to speak, he notice his words weren't making sense. The letters jumbled, his vision blurred, his left side completely numb. "I need help in here!" She yelled, putting her hand behind Danny's head and resting him on the bed. Pulling a mask of oxygen she placed it over his mouth, his eyes rolled backwards and his body began jerking. Nurses entered the room behind her as she began giving orders. "He's having a seizure, I need four of Ativan, now!" She yelled instructions as Don and Lindsay came back to the room to see the chaos before them.

"No. No, not again." Lindsay said putting a hand over her mouth in shock.

"We need to move him to surgery." She yelled as the doctors and nurses worked, wheeling Danny out of the room and into the OR.

"He'll be alright, Lindsay." Don said rubbing her shoulders, both unable to move.


	16. Chapter 16

It had become a game they knew too well, waiting. Waiting to see how their lives were going to change. Whether it meant life or death, something was going to change. The wait was painful. The click of heals pacing on the floor of the waiting room and the sound of relaxed panicked breathing filled the room as the team gathered once again for news for Danny. The surgery had been going on too long, or so it felt.

Lindsay had given up on pacing and had found a spot in the corner of the room to sit with her knees to her chest. She had given up the habit of biting her finger nails when she was a teenager, in the stress of the day had reverted years. Squaring off her wedding right finger, Stella got up from her seat and crossed the floor. Looking down at Lindsay, she saw that she was in a trance like state, staring ahead at nothing, just waiting.

"Linds, can I get you anything?" She asked, standing before her. Lindsay did not move. "Linds?" She said a little louder.

"Hum?" She said looking up at her friend, unaware that she had been talking to her.

"Can I get you anything?" She repeated.

"No... no, I'm fine." Lindsay replied, before returning to her raw finger nails.

"I can see that." Stella said sarcastically, taking a spot on the floor next to her crossing her legs and keeping a little distance between herself and her friend.

"I should call my mom." She said half hazily.

"You did already." Stella stared ahead, letting Lindsay's brain run.

"Right, right. How stupid of me." She said numbly.

"You're not stupid." Placing a hand on her shoulder, Lindsay finally looked at her.

"Then what's wrong with me?"

"What are you talking about?" Stella asked, offering a confused smile.

"Why do all these bad things keep happening to me? I mean to us? What did I do?" She said as tears formed in her eyes.

"Oh Linds, no. It's nothing you've done. Bad things happen to good people everyday. We've see it, but it doesn't mean you have done anything wrong." She rubbed her back.

"At least he had time with Rebecca, he got to meet her." She said looking at Stella. This time Stella didn't have it in her to be positive, she couldn't find any words of encouragement to tell her that Danny would be fine. This time, it just may not be the case.

"And she is beautiful." Stella smiled, taking in the moment as a tear slipped from Lindsay's eye and quickly wiped it away.

The shuffle of feet brought them back as the door handle turned. Everyone in the room, sucked in air as they awaited the conversation that they feared would happen. The creak of the door opened and Danny's mother came in with Rebecca in her arms.

"Oh thank god." Don said, watching Lindsay jump to her feet and reach for her child.

"I know you said I should wait at home with Becca, I just couldn't." Danny's mother explained as Lindsay pulled her in for a hug.

"Thanks for coming." She whispered as Danny's mother held her tight, Rebecca sitting between both mothers.

"Any news?" She asked, hoping for good news.

"They haven't given us any updates in the last couple hours. He had a stroke, they aren't sure what's been effected. From what we know, at least." Mac said standing up and shaking his mother's hand.

"Well, maybe no news is good news?" She said optimistically.

"Yeah, maybe." Lindsay said, finding standing too difficult she collapsed into a chair. Her optimism has dissolved into doubt and sadness, she got an extra four months, maybe that was enough for him.

"His father is on the way, he has been away on business all week. He said he'd be here in a couple hours. Perhaps he's be here when he wakes up." She explained as everyone looked at their feet. Mac saw the visible doubt on everyone's faces as he took Rebecca from her grandmother and sat down next to Lindsay.

"When she was born her eyes were bright blue like Danny's, now they are a little brown in the center." He said holding her up on his knee with a smile.

"The curse of my brown eyes." Lindsay smiled, running her thumb on her daughter's cheek. "I wonder if she'll remember him." She said in barely a whisper.

"Lindsay, stop it." Mac said angrily.

"No one else will say it, he's going to die! Why am I the only one who can admit it?" She yelled, standing up and marching out of the room. Rebecca began to cry with the sound of her yell, as Mac tried to calm the baby, Stella attempted to go after her only to be stopped by Danny's mother.

"Let me." She said holding a hand out to Stella as she turned and left the room after Lindsay.

* * *

It was not surprising that there weren't many places in the hospital to find solitude. After the months spent pacing the hallways, and waiting for Danny to finish his treatments, Lindsay knew this place better then her own home. The chill in the air was barely felt, spring was headed for New York but she didn't seen to care. The idea of taking Rebecca to the park for the first time and to swimming lessons didn't matter, because now she had to do it all herself. Lighting a cigarette, she took a long drag. The taste was horrible, but at the moment its all she needed.

"I didn't know you smoked." She heard from behind. Turning she saw Danny's mother opening the door to the hospital and walk over to her.

"I don't." She replied simply, folding her arms over her chest and hugging her body to keep warm.

"Well, I wish you would have told me, would have made family events easier." She smiled, taking out a pack herself and lighting one. Lindsay looked at her as she took a long drag.

"I didn't know... well, nothing." Lindsay shook as she rubbed her arms. "So, I guess I don't win any points for being positive." She said, looking away from her mother-in-law.

"If that's the case, I loose some too." She said plainly, taking off her coat and placing it around Lindsay's shoulders.

"Why's that?" She asked, excepting the coat.

"When you called and said he was having surgery again... I..." She choked up, Lindsay looked at her. "I went and found the picture from his graduation from the academy. I figured they'd want one for the funeral." She admitted letting a tear fall from her eye.

"I'm sorry, Mrs. Messer." Lindsay rubbed her shoulder.

"Oh sweetheart, call me Lily. We're family." She laughed.

"He asked me to marry him." She said nonchalantly.

"About time." Lily smiled.

"He said he wanted to do it here in the hospital, before surgery. I said yes to marrying him, but no to doing it here." She looked at her feet as she took another drag from her cigarette, letting it burn all the way down.

"Why?" She asked.

"I wanted our families there, and I didn't want that to be the way we said goodbye." She admitted.

"So I take it, this is guilt you're feeling?"

"Maybe. I wish I said yes. I would have take him any way that I could have him, now." A tear fell from her eye.

"I know." Lily put a hand on Lindsay's cheek. "Let's go back in." Lindsay looked up at her and stepped forward letting herself be held. She could see so much of Danny in his mother; the way her eyes peered into her soul, the way she held her, it was all Danny. Letting go, they walked hand-in-hand back to the surgical ward where they were waiting to hear news on Danny.

Stepping back into the waiting room, they stopped still holding each others hands tightly as Dr. Reese stood with their friends. Unable to hear what they were saying, Lindsay watched as they reacted. Don sat with his head in his hands, Mac stood defiantly taking in the information holding Stella's hand who held Rebecca in one arm. Dr. Reese turned to look at Lindsay, her face was unreadable. Lindsay felt her heart break into a million pieces, she was numb, she couldn't hear anything. Tears fell from her eyes without knowing they were running down her face. Suddenly the light was dissappearing as the world went black, her knees shook and she fell to the ground. She could hear her name being called as she fell unceremoniously to the floor.

* * *

**Hey guys, sorry I haven't updated in so long. But back and better then ever! Please give me some reviews!**


	17. Chapter 17

Love is a funny thing. It keeps you up at night, yet it lets you sleep peacefully. It takes you to worlds unknown, yet lets you live comfortably in this world. Something about the way we feel separates us from our animal instincts, letting us live happily with another, unburdened by little problems, and settled with the ones we endure. Love is more then a feeling but a way of life, a way to deal with life. Though it may not be enough to save our lives, but it is enough to help us through what life we have. It is the strength we known not that we have, until we need it.

* * *

Light felt blistering as Lindsay slowly opened her eyes, only to find herself in a bed. The ceiling looked strange, she wasn't at home in hers and Danny's comfortable queen sized bed, but somewhere she had been before, many times. Opening her eyes completely she turned her head, looking around reality kicked in and she was reminded of her horrible day. A dull throbbing pain, hit her in the side of the head as she looked to the right, pressing her head against the pillow.

"Ouch." She said softly, bringing her hand to the aching area.

"How are you feeling?" She heard a familiar voice from the foot of the bed.

"What happened?" She questioned, knowing the answer but looking to prolong the truth.

"You passed out, hit your head off the floor, but you're fine." Stella said, standing up and coming into view.

"I don't feel fine." She admitted, closing her eyes trying to hide from life. "Where's Rebecca?" She asked, not wanting to know about Danny's condition. Not yet.

"She's with Danny's mother and Don." She stated, sitting down beside Lindsay she took her hand and squeezed it. "Lindsay-"

"No, no don't tell me. Not yet. I'm not ready." She said cutting her off, and pulling her hand away.

"Lindsay..." Stella tried to speak again.

"No, Stella please? I can't hear that he's dead. Not yet." She begged, pulling herself up and stepping out of the hospital bed.

"Lindsay, he's alive." Stella said loudly, so that she would hear her.

"What?" Lindsay turned, gasping at the surprise.

"He's stable. There were some complications, but he is alive." Standing up she moved to her, holding her shoulders in her hands.

"There is something you aren't telling me." Lindsay stepping out of her grasp, but Stella held her tight.

"There is going to be some lasting damage from the stroke."

"What kind of damage?" Her head dropped to her chest. "What kind?" She repeated, fear coating her body.

"Most likely speech and memory loss. They'll be able to tell more when he wakes up." She explained.

"I want to see him." She said finally looking her in the eyes.

"Alright. I'll take you to him." Stella said, pulling her close for a much needed hug. Holding her for a couple minutes, she could feel that her heart was broken. No longer able to cry, Stella held her hoping her friends would be alright.

"How long was I out?" Lindsay asked against the side of Stella's neck, not moving from her embrace.

"Couple hours. They just moved Danny out of recovery into the I.C.U." She explained, finally letting go. Taking Lindsay's hand, she walked out of the room and down the hall. Dr. Reese had insisted that Lindsay stay on the same floor as Danny, keeping them together was the most important.

Entering the room, Lindsay felt her heart skip. The tubes attached to his body kept his chest moving, his hands covered by his Mother's and Don's. The look on their faces told her that they were grieving, but she couldn't understand why.

"Lindsay?" Mac said from the corner of the room, walking to her he gave her a hug.

"Thanks, Mac." She replied, letting go and walking to Danny's bedside. "How is he?" She asked, as Lily stood up and let her sit down in her spot.

"No change." She said squeezing her shoulder softly.

Looking across Danny's sleeping form to Don, she saw how red his eyes were. It looked as if he hadn't slept in months, and his face had grown lines of his frown to add to the shadow of his growing beard.

"Flack? You alright?" She asked, hoping to shake him from his trance like state.

"You know what I keep thinking about?" He said solemnly.

"What's that?" She replied, realizing her mothering voice had kicked in. Hoping to settle her friend, whom was more the upset.

"That one day, during his treatment, that he felt good enough to go outside." He stopped, and looking at his hands. Lindsay looked back at Stella, confused as to what he had meant, until he continued to explain. "He wanted to go to a game, but there weren't any so instead we went to the park. There were theses teens there, playing baseball. Danny couldn't play because he didn't have any strength, but he wanted to be outside, so we sat there. We watched them play for hours. He kept saying he was fine just watching, but I saw something different in him. It was like he was dying all over again. I didn't have anything to say to him, I couldn't tell him other wise because I thought he was dying." His voice broke.

"Don..." Lindsay said standing up and walking around the bed. Kneeling down in front of him she took his hand and squeezed it. "Are you feeling guilty for thinking he wouldn't survive this? Is that what's going on?" She said softly, hoping he'd look at her, but he didn't.

"I gave up on him, Lindsay. This is my fault." He shook his head, refusing to cry.

"God, I wish it were that easy." She laughed. "It's no ones fault. Danny didn't even know this could happen. All things considered, we're pretty lucky." She smiled as Don finally looked at her.

"Why?" He said looking at her through red eyes.

"If we had been sitting down for lunch and he had a stroke, we would have never had a chance to get here in time. If he had taken more time off of work and he had gone for a nap in the afternoon, he wouldn't have woken up. There are too many 'what ifs' to being feeling guilty for it. He's here and he is alive, because Danny admitted to feeling off. He admitted that he needed help, and for someone as stubborn as he is, I'd say that we are all pretty damn lucky." Lindsay finished, squeezing his hand she offered him a smile which he returned.

"You're right." He said, wiping his eyes free of wetness.

"Tell me, what else did the doctor say?" Lindsay asked, standing up she still held his hand as Don relaxed again looking up at his very sick friend in the bed before him.

Mac stepped forward from the corner of the room and began to explain. "The hemorrhage was quite bad, he lost a lot of blood. His brain was cut off from oxygen for quite a fair bit of time, Dr. Reese thinks there might be lasting brain damage." Putting his hand on her back, he felt the air catch in her lungs.

"Alright." She sighed, returning to her chair beside her loved one. "Now we wait." Lindsay said calmly letting a long breath drag from her mouth as Lily, Stella, Mac and a sleeping Rebecca sat in silence, waiting for any sign of life.

* * *

Minutes seemed to blend into hours, as the time went on people seemed to drift away. Staying in shifts, never letting Danny be alone. Lindsay had finally relented in going home to take care of herself and Rebecca while Lily stood over her son, watching him sleep.

It had been five days since his surgery and there was no change. His eyes would move under his closed lids, his hands would spasm, his toes would curl, but never did he wake. No one said it, but they all thought it, he wasn't going to wake up. Even his doctor showed no sign of hope. Sitting at his side, Lily stood from her chair and stepped close to her son. Running her hand down the side of his cheek, she noticed how chilled his skin felt. His hair that was shaved for the surgery had grown back into a soft buzz, she could see the scar of his previous surgeries but ignored them as she leaned forward and placed a kiss to the top of his head. The way she did when he was a little boy.

"Danny, baby? I love you. You're the light in my life, I couldn't have asked for a better son. I want you to know that it's OK. You are fighting so hard, I know it's painful and you've been through hell." She took a hard breath before continuing as the tears came to her eyes. "But you don't have to fight if you don't want to. You have a wonderful woman that loves you, you have a beautiful baby girl. You did good, you can sleep now." Tears fell from her eyes as she kissed his head again.

"Lily?" She heard from behind as she turned to see Lindsay standing in the doorway. "Everything alright?" She asked seeing the tears in her eyes.

"Hum? Yes, no I'm fine." She turned away wiping her eyes. "How... how is Becca?" She asked as she moved the back to moving the blankets around his body.

"She's good, she's with Stella." She said passing Lily a coffee.

"Oh thank you, dear." She said wiping tears away.

"You OK?" She asked again, feeling something was off.

"No. No, I wouldn't say that I am." Lily said softly. looking up at Lindsay she realized she could no longer lie. "He's gone."

Lindsay looked at her and then at Danny, unsure of what she meant. "I don't think he is, Mum." She said casually. "I can still feel him here."

"That man laying there is no longer my son." Her voice was stiff with frustration.

"Yes he is." Walking to his side, Lindsay picked up his hand and squeezed his fingers. "He's just stubborn. He'll wake up when he is ready." She smiled, and kissed his cheek. Lily had no words for her, she had said her goodbye to her son, eventually Lindsay would have to come to terms with it. A soft knock at the door brought them back.

"How's our boy?" Danny's father asked, coming into the room. "Hey, Linds." He said, walking up behind his wife and kissing the top of her head.

"No change." Lily said calmly.

"I talked to Rebecca this morning... sorry, Dr. Reese. She said that he is responding well to medication, they are going to ween him off of his ventilator." Lindsay explained, sitting at the side of his bed.

"That is the best news I have heard all day." His father said before walking over to Danny and placing a hand on his chest. "Hello son, not sure if you can hear me, but I wanted you to know that we're here. We're always here." He whispered and he kissed his son's temple.

"Charlie, I've got to run to the ladies room. I'll be back." Lily said, standing quickly and leaving the room.

Watching her leave, Lindsay turned to Charlie. "She going to be alright?" She asked.

"That depends entirely on Danny." He said offering a supportive smile. "Ever since what happened to his brother... well, you know." He didn't need to explain, she understood.

"Yeah, I know." She said sadly, faking a smile to her soon to be father-in-law.

"I have to believe he'll wake up. I have to believe that everything will work out." Charlie said settling in the chair opposite Lindsay.

"Me too." Sitting in silence was easy when there is a slumbering patient close. After a couple minutes, Charlie looked at Lindsay and noticed how soft she looked.

"You miss him, hum?" He asked.

"Every second, of every day." She said, giving him a smile.

"Me too." He looked back to his son. "He really loves you, you know that right?" Though it was more a statement then a question, Lindsay liked hearing it either way. "When Danny found out you were pregnant with Becca, he called me. Which is rare, because Danny is much of a chit chat kind of guy when it comes to me." Lindsay laughed, he wasn't much a of a chit chat kind of guy period. "I could tell by his voice that he was scared. Said he wasn't sure if he was going to be a good father, see I was never around much when he was younger and I can't blame the kid for fear of commitment, I was never committed to him, and for the longest time, Lily either. But then he said something to me that I will never forget." He scratched the back of his neck uncomfortably.

"What?" She turned her body, facing him.

"He said, 'Dad, you did the best you could with me, no matter what you think, I'm a better man because of you' and my heart broke." A tear came to his eye.

"That was sweet of him." Lindsay said putting a hand on his.

"My heart broke because it wasn't true. He is a better man because of you, Lindsay, not me. You changed him, he has grown up into a great man, and I thank you for that." Charlie smiles, causing a tear to fall from his eye.

A strange beep in the heart monitor caused their hearts to catch in their throats. "What was that?" Danny's father said, standing to get a better look. The monitors relaxed again, Danny's hands began to shake, softly as if he was afraid. "Danny?" He asked.

Lindsay stood so quickly she was nearly dizzy. Moving to the side of his face, she ran her fingers across his forehead. "Danny, you with me? Open your eyes, baby." She whispered, his hands began to shake again. His eye movement was quick, and suddenly his eyes began to open. Slowly the lid separated, showing the softest glow of glue. With the tube in his throat, he could not talk and even if he could she didn't think he would have the strength. "Dad, go get Dr. Reese." Lindsay said taking Danny's hands in hers holding them close to her chest.

Charlie left the room in a hurry, leaving Lindsay with Danny. His eyes fluttered, barely awake he stared up at Lindsay. Running her hands through his hair, she felt his hands stop shaking and relax. "You're going to be alright, just relax." She said softly. Softly closing his eyes, he gave a soft nod as a gurgling sound came from the tube in his mouth. "We'll get this taken out, just try to breath." No longer able to hide her feelings, a tear rolled down her cheek landing on Danny's cheek.


	18. Chapter 18

The hours after Danny had opened his eyes felt dreamlike, as if stuck between the real realm and his subconscious. Nothing the same, nothing felt like it as if it belonged to him. His voice was rough and his accent had changed, now it was average and low. Words took longer to form and his speech was slow. The initial tests said that as the brain healed his symptoms would be less, but waiting was the difficult part. The right side of his body was weak, barely able to lift his arm on his own, the sensation of pins and needles covered the skin causing him to gasp at sudden movements. Days of tests seemed endless as he was wheeled back and forth between departments of the hospital as Dr. Reese did her best to get a clear opinion on his recovery.

Two days later, after having yet another MRI, he found himself being wheeled back into his room, only to find it completely empty for the first time since he had woken up. Relief washed over him as a smile came to his lips. Locking the wheels of his chair, the nurse moved around him, getting ready to assist him back into his hospital bed. Putting his hand softly on her forearm, she looked up at him in surprise. Noticing he was trying to form words, she stopped what she was doing and waited for him to speak, instead he simple shook his head.

"You'd like to stay here?" She asked.

"Can you unlock... the wheel's, please?" He asked slowly as he trained with mouth to move with his brain.

"Sure. Hit the call button if you need anything?" She said pointing to the button beside the bed. "Would you like some water?" She asked before readying herself to leave the room. Shaking his head again, he smiled at her as she turned and left the room, leaving him completely alone in the center of the room.

Over the past couple months, there hadn't been a lot of time for him to sit and think. Really think. With most of his energy being spent on getting healthy, the future never paid him much notice. He had forgotten to dream about the things he was looking forward to in life. Though he was half the man he used to be, or so he thought, he knew that he needed to think about what he still had and not about what he has lost.

Taking a deep breath and holding on to what energy he had left, he pulled his feet along the floor, walking himself and the chair towards the window of his hospital room. It was spring, his favourite time of the year, a time when the world was fresh with a new season and a new start. The sun was high above the city and was warm through the window shades. Opening up the blinds, he sat in the sun letting it soak into his skin. Outside his window, he looked down and saw a little girl and a little boy playing tag in the grassy area beside the parking lot. Ducking behind trees and benches, they chased each other all the while laughing and yelling back and forth. Watching them a smile cast itself over his face and he thought of Rebecca. One day when she was big enough, she too would be running around with her blond curls in pig tails playing with her friends. The happiness she'll have in her life, and the memories they'd share brought a tear to his eye. This time however, they were tears of joy. They were tears for the moments he'd get to share with her.

"We're waiting on his latest MRI before we can make any decisions, but the outlook is good." Dr. Reese explained to Lindsay as they walked into the room together, taking Danny out of his happy moment. Turning to see them at the door, he noticed them looking at the bed finding it empty, clearing his throat he wiped the tears from his eyes as their eyes they noticed him.

"Danny, how are you feeling?" Dr. Reese asked as she walked to him, pulling a chair and sitting across from him beside the window.

"Good." He said slowly, wishing he would show them that he was good. He was happy, but his face told them different. Lindsay stood behind him massaging his shoulders.

"You seem to be doing very well. As the swelling subsides you should have an easier time with words. It may take some time though." She explained with a hopeful smile.

"It's getting... easier." He said forcing his mouth into a smile.

"I can see that. In two days you have made great progress." She smiled as Lindsay kissed the top of his head.

"Becca?" He asked looking up at Lindsay behind him.

"She's with your Mom." She explained squeezing his shoulder.

"I want... to see her." He stuttered out. Not seeing his daughter much in the past two days has begun to drag on him. Never before did he realize how much he loved and needed his family before now.

"Your Mom is going to bring her by in an hour or so, but I'll call her and tell her you are awake now." Lindsay smiles as she kisses his cheek and leaves the room to do so.

"Danny, I really want to let you know how sorry I am." Dr. Reese said softly, as Danny offered a confused look. "I feel I could have prevented this long recovery by being more thorough on your previous check ups. I'm sorry I didn't catch this sooner." Danny could tell she was truly hurting.

Sitting forward in his chair, he reached forward with his good hand and placed it softly on top of hers. "Thank... you." He said as his tongue caught in his mouth. Confused momentarily, he continued. "For saving... my life." He smiled the best he could.

"You're welcome." She excepted his thanks, and put a hand over his and held it tight. As a tear formed in her eye, she shook it off and wiped it with her free hand. "Sorry, I normally don't get so attached." She admitted with an awkward laugh. Danny couldn't help but smile as she shook off her emotions.

"Me neither." He said softly.

"Let's work on getting you out of this hospital and home to your baby? What do you say?" She said in a chipper tone reaching out her hand to shake his. Danny began to laugh giving her an enthusiastic nod.

"Deal!" He said with a smile as he reached out and shook her hand.

* * *

It's funny how fast time moves by. Minutes melting into hours and pass into days, before you notice months go by. It had become clear to Danny that things in life are not always perfect, and that they do not always go as planned. At the moment, he sat comfortably at his desk chair, looking at his computer before him, in awe of what he was seeing. The photos of his daughter over time, from a tiny baby in Lindsay's arms at the hospital, taken by her God Father Uncle Flack, to the day she began to crawl, he sat smiling at the memories, wondering where the time went.

Growing up, he was always close to his parents. Always knowing that they could trust him, it was never easy to lie. When he got sick he knew that they would find out eventually but he couldn't bring himself to tell them himself. The brain tumor damaged more then just his soft tissue, but it had forever changed the friendships and relationships with every person he knew. His best friend became more protective, Lindsay had become more invested with every ache and pain he had mentioned or hadn't mentioned for that matter. He acted like he didn't notice the side glances when he struggled, or the look of fear when he rubbed his temple with a headache. The worry they shared was a new constant in his life, something he had grown used to over the past couple of months.

One thing that remained the same, was the love his beautiful daughter. Being far to young to understand that her Daddy was sick, the snuggles stayed the same. In his time of recovery whenever he had a bad day, Lindsay would simply pass her off to him, letting them sleep peacefully on the couch together. The soft breaths of his daughter against his chest caused any pain to diminish, disappear as if it never even happened. She was his reason to live, to survive, and to dream.

"What are you looking at?" Lindsay said, startling him out of his day dreams.

"Just looking at Becca." He said calming his breathing, as Lindsay wrapped her arms around his neck from behind him.

"You do know it's five-thirty in the morning, right?" She asked kissing his neck.

"Couldn't sleep." Closing his eyes he turned around in his chair, facing his wife.

"You alright? You don't have any-" Pushing his finger over her lips, he stopped her before she even got a chance to start.

"I'm fine." He smiled, pulling her down into his lap. "I was just thinking about everything and I thought I'd look back over the past year."

"It was a pretty dramatic year." She smiled and kissed him softly.

"We did good though, right?" He asked moving his hands around her waist.

"We did good." She said kissing him again. Pulling her arms around his neck, she brought him into her only intensifying the kiss.

"I love you." He whispered tasting her tongue entangled in his.

"I love you." She replies, Danny smiles into her mouth loving that fact that she didn't say 'too' afterwards, making it mean more to him.

Danny's hands began to trace lines down her spine, as her t-shirt (that was actually his) began to feel suffocating. Pulling it up over her head, he kissed the soft skin on her chest as the air in her lungs came in shorter supply.

"I miss you." She says through a moan, as he worked his mouth around the nape of her neck.

"I'm not going anywhere." He whispered as he lifted her hips so her knees were on either side of his.

"Promise me?" She asked pulling his face up so he could look into her eyes. "Promise me you won't leave?" She knew the question wasn't rational, she didn't care.

"I promise. I'm here, for good." He said as he kissed her slowly. The speed in which they started was forgotten as they sat in their living room with Lindsay half naked, really and truly enjoying each others presence. Feeling her heart beating against his chest, she wrapped her arms around his neck. Squeezing him tight she rested her head against his chest; standing up he held her tight as Lindsay wrapped her legs around his waist as he carried her to the bedroom.

Having his strength back after six months of recovery since his final surgery, he was beginning to feel more like the man she had fallen in love with. It was going to take more then a brain tumor and a mild stroke to take him down. His life was perfect, even if he wasn't, he couldn't ask for more then that. Smiling at his love in his arms, he kicked his bedroom door shut behind him, ready for his life to start again.

**THE END**

* * *

**I fully resisted the urge to say "And they lived happily ever after"**

**Just so everyone knows, I was going to have him die, I just couldn't bring myself to do it. I hope everyone liked the outcome. Constructive reviews are very much appreciated. Please feel free to tell me what you thinked, what parts you liked and what you didn't!**

**Thanks for reading!**

**Trix**


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